Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Tough On Crime - FAIL

 So how's that "tough on crime" approach working then?

What this could mean:
  • Maybe tougher sentences just don't work
  • Maybe crime goes up in a recession, regardless of the law and order policies you adopt.
  • This might suggest there is a link between poverty and crime.
  • This might in turn suggest working to alleviate poverty could bear more fruit than futile "get tough" policies.
  • John Key's plan to reduce crime has joined his cycleway, his plan to catch us up to Australia by 2025, and his plan to save the whales.
Don't tell David Garrett. It might be too much for the poor man to cope with.

Commerce Select Committee Says No To Software Patentability

The Commerce Select Committee has published its report on the Patents Bill.

Despite the fact that the Bill contains an awful lot of material on a whole range of interesting things, the only thing people seem to be focusing on (and that anyone reading this blog will probably have the faintest interest in) is the fact the Select Committee has recommended computer programmes not be patentable.

Understandably, the open source software movement is thrilled. I’m not convinced the decision will do many favours for the software industry as a whole, and I don’t take the delight expressed by the open source movement to be in any way representative of the software industry as a whole. But the movement is an effective and organised one, and they are to be congratulated for convincing the Select Committee of their arguments.

Even if most of the arguments don’t stack up.

Here are some of the main myths about software patentability.

It is too easy to get patent protection for software

If that were the case our patents register would be flooded with software patents. Where are they all?

Software patents only help the big guys

In fact, they are often used to hurt the big guys. In the last 12 months Microsoft (the perennial bad guy in the open source world) has been stung a number of times by patent infringement claims, by mostly small enterprises. They’ve had to pay out hundreds of millions.

There is nothing inventive in most software

This is debatable. For starters, most software isn’t patented, precisely because it usually won’t satisfy the current requirements for patentability (i.e. novelty, inventiveness). That doesn’t mean some software isn’t genuinely innovative or inventive. Just because something is written in a code that is an improvement or combination of other bits of code developed by others, doesn’t mean that what is created isn’t inventive. Patents don’t protect code. That may seem to many an obvious point, but I wonder if the point has been lost on some involved in this debate.

Copyright is an adequate protection for software programmes

Open source proponents tend to be against copyright too, but let’s look for a moment at whether copyright can adequately protect a piece of software.

Copyright can be used to protect the expression of an idea. So the source code for a piece of software, being the written instructions for the software, comprises a copyright work. Thus the main copyright protection for software is in the programming, rather than in the idea behind the software or its functionality.

There is also some limited copyright protection available for screen displays or user interfaces, but a person wanting to use someone else’s idea can easily avoid infringing these copyright works.

So there’s really very little to stop a person from copying the idea or functionality behind a piece of software and creating their own, so long as they avoid copying the source code and avoid infringing the other limited forms of copyright.

The software industry is unique and needs special treatment

Everyone likes to think they’re special, and that nobody faces the same challenges.

But patents no more stifle the software industry than they do any other sector of the economy.

It is true that most software developers build new software based on what already exists. But that’s the same in nearly all industries, not just the software one.

If we’re going to ban software patents, it makes little sense to have a patent system at all.


I should make it clear that I’m not against open source software, or against people using business models based on open source software. Indeed, I have a number of clients who prefer to do business using open source models.

But the open source movement is more like a religion for some people, where certain things are taken as inalienable truths and where anyone who argues a contrary view is part of the problem. The IP lawyers and patent attorneys are the only ones who actually understand how copyright and software patentability works, but their objections can be easily dismissed because “well, they would say that”.

But feel free to take a dissenting view if you think this article has taken ttoo polemical a turn.

Imperator Fish Helpful Hints

How to launch a career in the entertainment world without having any talent:
  • Be the son of someone well-known.
  • Cause gratuitous offence to a large group of people. This will get you into the news.
  • Your career is now launched. Sit back and laugh at the tools giving you their cash.
******

How not to get elected Supermayor:
  • Communicate almost exclusively via the medium of text message.
  • Have a little wee in public.
******

How to deal with elected officials who won't do what they're told:
  • Sack them and appoint your mates in their place.
  • Make sure you appoint a figurehead to make your pooey messiness at least smell respectable.
 ******

How to become politically irrelevant:
  • Fight hard on a key issue. Organise a march across the country to express outrage over the Government's plans.
  • When the next lot get into power, do a deal with them so you get to sit at the top table.
  • Now when the new lot bend you over the table just like the last lot did, smile and pretend to enjoy it.

"Which One's Richie McCaw? And Why Are They All In White?"

Honestly, the current Government makes running this blogsite so easy. I don't know what will happen if the other lot gets in. I'll be out of business!

Remember this post?
Now we learn this:
Prime Minister John Key has agreed to become Patron of the All Whites for the 2010 FIFA World Cup Campaign.
The offer was extended to Mr Key by the Chairman of New Zealand Football, Frank van Hattum and CEO Michael Glading.
No matter how many imaginary stupid things I have my PM say or do on this site, the real one keeps trumping me.

Guess they'll have to re-issue that invoice now.

Maybe It's Just Poverty

We are told that those on welfare are bludgers, are "living the dream", and need a "kick in the pants".

We were reminded by National MP Todd McClay during parliamentary debate yesterday that the people who killed Nia Glassie were on benefits.
I pay great tribute to young Nia Glassie, and I have little or no regard for the people who murdered her. But I say to members that if we look at that family and those around them, there was long-term welfare dependency. The people who murdered her were on benefits and did not have jobs. Largely, the long-term welfare dependency that was promoted by the previous Government in New Zealand did nothing to help that family. This Government will stand up and fight for those people. Thank you.
The fact that, statistically speaking, beneficiaries are more likely to abuse children than non-beneficiaries, tells us nothing useful about welfare. The message McClay and others are trying to send is that welfare dependency is a major cause of child abuse. Why else would he raise the matter during a debate on welfare reform?

It should be pretty obvious that welfare dependency is a side-effect of poverty. Very few people would choose the lifestyle of a beneficiary. Why would they? They are usually forced into it because of the shit that life throws at them.

So why do we focus our attacks on beneficiaries, when the real enemy is most likely poverty itself?

Because if we had to acknowledge that poverty is a major factor in crime and abuse, the Government would have to allocate more resources to lifting people out of poverty, rather than spending millions on pointless "tough on crime" policies that target the already-marginalised, and on tax cuts for high earners.

It's easier to give the people at the bottom a "kick in the pants", isn't it?

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Our New Go To Market Strategy

More Big Thinking from the Prime Minister

When I came to office I promised big things. I’m not ashamed to say I’m ambitious for this country and its people. That’s why when National came to power in 2008 we told officials they had to go back to the drawing board, sharpen their pencils, think outside the box, and come up with new ideas to lift our performance and add value.

For too long our economic performance has been poor. We have had our opportunities to lift our game, but successive governments have failed to grasp the mettle, and have rested on their laurels, preferring instead to toe the line. Of course, hindsight is 20/20. But now the shoe’s on the other foot and we need a game-changer. A paradigm shift that will bring growth to our economy and boost productivity.

This blue sky thinking is finally bearing fruit, and I am pleased to announce today a package of proposals that will help New Zealand get back its competitive advantage.

We will all need to give 110% on this, because Rome wasn't built in a day. But first we must lay the foundations. We need to be running a tighter ship. And that means peeling back the onion to get back to basics.

But enough beating about the bush. In a nutshell, everything comes back to the language we use.

That is why, going forward, we will be requiring all Government departments to apply our new business language policy. Their parroting of empty and worn-out phrases in official reports and documents will ensure they are adding to the value chain and leveraging their synergies, while singing from the same hymn-sheet.

But it isn’t enough to regurgitate tired clichés and meaningless business terms, although that’s certainly a good start. We need to do more to reform the nuts and bolts of our language, to make it a high-performance cutting-edge tool. That is why we are announcing a wholesale reform of the inefficient alphabet sector.

Too many vowels and consonants have been living the dream, while other hard-working letters pick up the slack. We say enough is enough. It’s time some of these letters got a kick in the pants. That’s why from 1 April this year the rules will change so that under-performing and under-used letters, such as “x” and “j”, will be assessed regularly to see if they genuinely need or deserve to belong in our alphabet.

We will also be raising the bar for other under-performing  letters, by implementing a package of efficiency reforms aimed at trimming waste and removing duplication. Officials have already identified the low hanging fruit – areas where gains can be made quickly. As an example, they have discovered that in almost every case the letter “c” can be replaced by either ”k” or “s”.

This culture of waste in our language is everywhere. In many cases we have multiple consonants being used to do a job that one could easily do. We don’t need two “t”s in the word “butter” And the sheer wastage in quantities of “s” in the word “assess” is a disgrace.

But these reforms are not just about window-dressing. Radical change is needed. A review of best-practice shows that the use of vowels is both unnecessary and unsustainable. We can look to countries such as Poland to guide us in removing all vowels from our alphabet.

And we must redouble our efforts in the war on "P". That is why this Government is announcing that from 1 April this year, possession of this consonant will be a criminal offence.

The bottom line is we’re not afraid to push the envelope in order to leverage resources. If we want to hit the ground running we need to bring out our “A” game and bring value to the table. My government will take ownership of this problem, and will lead the charge in hunting out inefficiency and waste in the alphabet.

This is mission critical, so we need to step up to the plate and put a stake in the ground. This is where the rubber hits the road.

At the end of the day, we all know that the elephant in the room is an 800 pound gorilla. But if we ignore our core competencies we risk throwing out the baby with the bathwater. I’m not prepared to drop the ball on this one.

Language reform will bring a much needed step change, and will bring jobs, growth, and ponies for everyone.

It’s a win-win.

Maori Party Supports And Opposes Welfare Reform

It can’t be easy being a Maori Party supporter.

For one thing, it’s never clear exactly what your team supports. Sometimes it seems like the only thing the Maori Party’s MPs have in common is that they’re Maori.

Today on Morning Report we heard another example of confused bumbling by party leadership. Co-leader Tariana Turia, who is also the Associate Social Development Minister, was interviewed by Sean Plunkett about National’s proposed changes to welfare. She started the interview by saying she was in favour of welfare reform, but by the end of the interview it sounded like she was against the changes.

In fact, it became clear throughout the interview (and this was with Sean Plunkett being relatively nice for once) that neither Turia nor others in the party have any clue what the official position is. Which makes you wonder why Turia allowed herself to be interviewed on the subject.

Turia made it clear she would not vote against the measures, because her role as Associate Social Development Minister does not permit her to. Isn’t it odd, then, that the same role did not give her any input into the creation of the policy?

The welfare changes will hit Maori hard, so it ought to be pretty easy for the Maori Party to take a firm position on this matter. They cannot blame the requirements of working with National for their diffidence, because the Maori Party is not bound to vote for the measures under their confidence and supply arrangements with National.

By trying to play all sides and picking none, the Maori Party risks becoming irrelevant.

Monday, March 29, 2010

Trial Judge Marries Alleged Abuser to Alleged Victim

This US judge probably won't win any awards from women's groups.
A Maryland judge who declared a break in an alleged batterer's misdemeanor domestic violence trial so he could marry the defendant to the claimed victim and prevent her from testifying against him has been taken off the bench.

As of today, Baltimore County District Judge Darrell Russell Jr. has been indefinitely assigned to his chambers, where he will review motions and civil cases, reports ABC News.

Last week he stopped the trial of Frederick Wood, 29, so that he and his unidentified 27-year-old girlfriend could get a marriage license. When they returned with the document, Russell married them in chambers. A spousal privilege can be asserted to prevent husband and wife from testifying against each other.

"It's very frustrating. We view very seriously the crime of domestic violence," says Deputy State's Attorney Leo Ryan. "We understand that very often the nature of this crime means the victims are reluctant to testify."

The network includes a link to an audio recording of the court hearing that Russell paused for the wedding. At its conclusion, the judge notes that he can't sentence Wood for any crime, since he found the defendant not guilty. "But earlier today," the judge adds, "I sentenced you to life married to her."
I wonder if it occurred to the judge at any point that what he was doing was at the very least "slightly unusual". Or even a little bit wrong.

And the alleged abuser in this case sounds like a thoroughly unpleasant fellow.

What's This? A Compliment?

Stop the presses! I have something nice to say

Amidst the Herald's harem of snarling seething mostly right-wing columnists, Tapu Misa sticks out.

She makes her arguments unfashionably - using evidence and reason to make her points.

Her latest article on the proposed changes to benefit entitlement rules is a good example of this fine work, and is worth a read. It is calm, well-argued, and convincing.

I spend too much time on this blog slagging off the work of others. But Tapu Misa is one columnist who is always worth a read*.

* It helps she's not a raving right-wing nutbar but, eh?

How John Key Can Close The Gap With Australia

This story on Stuff has given me an idea.
Russia's president thought the country had too much time on its hands, so on Sunday he eliminated two of its 11 time zones.

The changes mean that Chukotka - Russia's eastern extreme, just across the Bering Strait from Alaska - is now nine hours ahead of Russia's westernmost area, the Kaliningrad exclave sandwiched between Lithuania and Poland. Formerly, there was 10 hours' difference.

As well as eliminating the time zone that previously covered the Chukotka and Petropavlovsk-Kamchatsky regions in the Pacific Far East, President Dmitry Medvedev ordered that Samara and Udmurtia, two regions in central Russia, should be on the same time as Moscow.
My message to anyone thinking about challenging Dmitry Medvedev is simple: you clearly should not mess with this man. He can change time.

Anyway, here’s my big idea. John Key wants us to close the gap with Australia. But our per capita income continues to trend downwards when compared with Australia.

But one thing we can close is the time gap. Let’s abolish our time zone and switch to Australia's Eastern  Standard Time.

And that way the good PM can say he kept his promise to move us closer to Australia.

Just remember when Key is lauded to the heavens that it was my idea first.

Urinating Minister Must Go - Critics

Embattled Local Government Minister Rodney Hide has refused to resign, amid claims he is drunk with power.

Critics of the Minister say the havoc wrought by him throughout the local government scene has left him intoxicated with power.

North Shore mayor Andrew Williams is one of those calling for Hide’s resignation.

“He’s been pissing all over the people of Auckland for too long,” said Mr Williams.

Hide, speaking exclusively to Imperator Fish, denied he had a power problem.

“I’m just a regular guy who likes to slash and burn everything the people of Auckland hold dear.”

Hide also refused to comment over claims he had been urinating all over the prospects of New Zealand’s biggest city.

The Minister’s caucus colleagues are also eager for him to resign. One caucus member interviewed, who wanted only to be known as “Heather,” said Hide had to go.

“It’s simple, really. Rodney’s a strong performer and won Epsom for us, and I owe him everything. If it wasn’t for Rodney I wouldn’t be here.

“I’m sick of him holding this brutal truth against me. He has to go. I want a turn at leader!”

Sunday, March 28, 2010

The Wiggles Concert

The kids loved the show - especially the colour, the dancing and the acrobatics.

The kids are still getting used to Sam (he's the new yellow Wiggle), but got a treat when he ran up the stairs waving at them.

And of course the band makes twice as much from the merchandise suckered-in parents like us purchase afterwards, than from the ticket price.

But the kids loved every moment of it. And, sadly, because I knew most of the songs I found it all rather enjoyable.

My Earth Hour Diary


Earlier in the day: Hire a plane and buzz around Auckland flying an Earth Hour banner. 

8:30pm: Lights out! Better go for a drive and see if others in the neighbourhood are joining in. Power up the Humvee and go for a cruise.

8:52pm: Back home. It's amazing how easily you can cope without electricity. Am feeling really good about doing my bit for the environment. Want to just sit outside and stare at the stars. So light a bonfire on the back yard and enjoy getting back to nature.

9:12pm: Fire burning low. So pour some more petrol on it.

9:30pm: We made it! Turn every light in the house on to celebrate. That's me for another year. Now I don't need to lift another finger for the environment for another 12 months.

Friday, March 26, 2010

Off To The Wiggles


I am off with the family to see the Wiggles tomorrow at Vector Arena.

Last time I was at Vector I saw Faith No More. They were loud and they rocked the place.

But this might be a bit different.

I will want to blend in, otherwise I will just feel very old when I realise most of the people there are at least 30 years younger than me. So what should I wear if I want to fit in with teh yoof? Maybe a black t-shirt won't be the look. A diaper?

And should I take something before the show to get me going? If so, what? Milk?

And there's something I'd like to know - if Captain Feathersword really is the "Friendly Pirate", how did he lose his eye?

Right Thinking - No Compensation For Bain

Guest columnist and hard-hitting conservative, Dr. Frank Shizenhausen, gives his verdict on the justice system.

And so it begins. Not content with sucking up millions of our dollars, they return yet again to the well.

I'm talking of course about David Bain's legal team and his disgusting compensation bid.

We all know Bain's guilty. Ask any policeman what he thinks and he'll tell you Bain's the one who got away. Not since Arthur Thomas and David Dougherty eluded justice through various technicalities (for example, by presenting incontrovertible evidence that they could not have committed the offences they were convicted of) has the judicial system witnessed such a monstrous wrong.

It's no surprise then that Bain's campaign for a retrial became a cause celebre for many on the Left. That's because the loony Left think it's their duty to heap scorn on the brave hardworking men and women who make up the police force. The not guilty verdict was a direct attack on the integrity of our thin blue line, and the methods the police use to convict monsters like Bain. The release of Bain was a victory for the socialists and the liberals, and gave them further confidence to attack with impunity the very foundations of our society - decency, respect for authority and self-discipline.

So the Bain not-guilty verdict was a disaster for the entire nation and for our children.

But even if Bain hadn't committed the heinous crimes we all know he's responsible for, that cannot excuse his milking the taxpayer for so many years. It cost the taxpayer hundreds of thousands to imprison him for 13 years. But if Bain was not guilty he shouldn't have been in jail. So why has Bain not been billed for this unnecessary expense?

You see, Bain wants it both ways. He either deserved to go to prison, or he didn't. If he didn't we just ended up spending a huge amount of money for no reason. On one man. Who wants more money! Why doesn't he pay us?

And then there's the legal aid system - yes, that convenient cash cow despicable defence lawyers so love to milk. The sooner that fund is abolished the better. If crims and crooks had to fend for themselves in the courts they would soon learn crime doesn't pay.

I'm fed up. And I'm feeling light-headed. I forgot my medication again. Now where did they leave it?  Damn nurses here must be socialists.

Time To Clamp Down On Whale Gangs


The Sensible Whaling Trust is appalled by the latest killer whale gang murder.

The New Zealand Herald this morning reported that a female killer whale hunted down a pseudo orca and ruthlessly murdered it in front of a group of shocked tourists.

“This is exactly the kind of thing we’ve been trying to stop,” said the group’s spokesman, Ahab McReverend.

“These offending whales get high on fish and then go on a spree of violence, not giving a damn about the harm they cause. They end up fighting among themselves, and society is left to pick up the pieces.”

Mr McReverend said that authorities wanted to clamp down on whales, but were constrained by the law and the culture of tolerating whale gangs.

“I know for a fact that a number of ministers in this government would like nothing more than to see these vile aquatic monsters purged from the sea. But their hands are tied by idiotic treaties, and by the incessant whining of the liberal news media about the rights of gangs.

"At least in this case the victim was a member of another whale gang. But next time we might not be so lucky. Our children will not be safe until the cetacean menace is wiped out completely."

Q&A On Those Foreign Devils

Where I answer all your questions about foreign investment into New Zealand

Question: Should we be concerned about the plans by Hong Kong company Natural Dairy to buy up New Zealand dairy farms?

Imperator Fish. Yes!

Q: But if we want Fonterra to be able to buy up Chinese dairy farms, don't we need to permit the Chinese to buy ours?

IF: That's a different issue. Stop asking awkward questions. This is my blog, and I don't like your tone. Don't make me ban you.

Q: Isn't foreign capital just what this country needs to grow its infrastructure and create jobs?

IF: What? You want us to be ruled by a foreign capital? You're one of Them, aren't you? Ready to do the bidding of your puppetmasters in Beijing. I knew it!

Q: But they're only buying a tiny percentage of our industry. What's the big deal?

IF: It may be a tiny percentage to them, but it means everything to us. If these foreign devils took over the entire country it would only be a tiny percentage of their total land mass. Don't talk to me about tiny percentages.

Q: Aren't you just being racist?

IF: Not at all. I hate everyone. Haven't you been reading my blog?

Thursday, March 25, 2010

Some Advice To Gerry Brownlee

If National wishes to win the PR battle over Conservation mining they could start by explaining to us in clear terms what the economic benefits are. If they can't they should drop the plan until they can get their story straight. Their story continues to change, and its holes are bigger than an open cast mine.

And another thing - carping on about how many mining consents Labour granted on Conservation land won't work. How many mining consents did Labour grant over Schedule 4 land?

How many?

If you're goimg to employ lies, you should at least make them good ones.

Right Wing Think-Tank Pans MMP

Apologies for the length of this post. I just couldn't stop writing.

A right-wing Australasian think-tank* called the Centre for Independent Studies has published a report on New Zealand’s electoral system.

The authors attack MMP, and then propose replacing it with a system that adopts many of the features of First Past the Post (FPP). As a sop to concerns about FFP leading to a lack of representation for minorities and women, the report proposes an upper house elected on a proportional basis.

But the report fails on a number of levels, and its recommendations don't sound particularly sensible.

The report authors say:
The compromises that MMP encourages have led to a more consensual style of government, but it has also contributed to ad hoc lawmaking, an inability of government to take proper charge of a legislative programme, and pork barrel politics and ‘back room deals.’
It is true we have a more consensual style of government under MMP. Consensus politics have ensured we no longer see wild and sudden changes in policy direction from government to government.
MMP is a system concerned with process rather than outcomes. Although MMP has brought proportionality to parliamentary representation, it has produced political results that can hardly claim to be representative. This is because minor parties have a greater say in contentious legislation than their vote warrants. MMP was also designed to give women and ethnic groups more representation in Parliament. Maori and women’s representation has somewhat improved under MMP, but there is little or no evidence that it was MMP itself that led to this improvement.
Making a system representative of society means giving minorities a voice they never had under FPP. MMP has largely achieved this. The “somewhat" is also misplaced. Levels of representation of Maori and women have increased significantly under MMP. Co-incidence?

The report at least acknowledges that FPP was anything but perfect, even if the authors don’t think MMP is the answer.
Before adopting the current system, New Zealand had a First Past the Post (FPP) electoral system, which it had modelled on the British system. The most obvious problem with FPP was the immense amount of power invested in the cabinet, which could act as an elective dictatorship with the aid of a traditionally strong party whip system.

A new electoral system should provide for appropriate checks and balances on executive power while still making it possible to govern effectively. These are, admittedly, often contradictory goals. However, we believe MMP fails to satisfactorily deliver either.
The authors find aspects of the MMP system strange, and they cite a number of incidents as proof of this.
In the 2008 election, MPs were re-elected to Parliament and remained as representatives although they had been rejected by their own local voters.
I personally didn’t find this strange. Did others?
Former Deputy Prime Minister Dr Michael Cullen spent his tenure as Minister of Finance as a list MP without ever getting the backing of his local voters.
Again, I did not find anything weird in that.
Former leader of the opposition Dr Don Brash never attempted to stand in an election and convince an electorate to vote for him since the introduction of MMP. His political career was at the mercy of his party.
We have a strong party system, as do most democracies. I don’t know of many electorate MPs (Winston Peters and a few one-man parties excepted, such as United Future and Jim Anderton) whose political career hasn’t always been at the mercy of their party. If your party dumps you you’re generally gone, whether your system is an FPP one or an MMP one.
Former Minister of Foreign Affairs Winston Peters was officially not part of the government except on foreign affairs issues. He publicly opposed the New Zealand China Free Trade Agreement but travelled to Beijing to sign the treaty as the government’s representative.
Okay, I’ll agree that was something many of us struggled with at the time. But Winston has always been an enigma, even before the introduction of MMP.

The report points out that MMP creates representation anomalies. Like the Maori Party overhang. Or the fact that ACT got fewer votes than NZ First last election but got five seats to NZ First’s zero. Those are flaws with the system, because the level of representation does not reflect the proportion of votes cast for these parties. And it would be nice if someone were to find a way to fix those problems without giving every 1% loony party a chance to hold the balance of power.

The authors say:
Instead of producing a robust and considered policymaking process, the MMP system has resulted in the government having to negotiate on legislation and the process becoming more time-consuming and complex.
Yes, that is why it is called consensus politics. The report’s authors appear not to understand the concept. A strong government is not always a good government. Remember the days of Muldoon? Or the fourth Labour government? In the days of FPP a party with less than 40% of the total vote could drive through anything it wanted. Now you need the support of 50% plus to get anything done. I have not heard a compelling argument why that is a bad thing, and the report’s authors fail to deliver one.

The report takes the view that list MPs merely toe the party line, and that while there may be a diversity of representation in Parliament, there is not a diversity of views. That may be the case within individual parties, but the diversity of views comes from the number of parties now in Parliament. Before MMP we were lucky if we had three parties represented. Since the introduction of MMP we’ve often had 7-8 parties in the house. And under our system of tight party discipline there has never been a tradition of MPs crossing the floor. Indeed, when an MP under FPP crossed the floor (remember Marilyn Waring?) it often precipitated a political crisis.

Having thus criticised the system for putting a brake on effective government, the authors of the report then recommend an upper house!
Any discussion of reforming the democratic process in New Zealand should focus on MMP and bicameralism, i.e. whether New Zealand would benefit from having a second house of Parliament.
The report’s authors also appear to have misread the current political landscape.
MMP initially offered a wide range of different parties, a number of whom were open to coalition partners from either side of the house. Over time, however, these parties have shrunk, and parties with similar political goals have gravitated towards each other. There are now two opposing blocs. The ‘left wing’ consists of the Labour Party, the Greens, and Progressives; the ‘right wing’ includes the National Party and the ACT Party. Of the others, NZ First is no longer represented in Parliament, and United Future is down to just one MP with an electorate seat. At the time of writing, the parliamentary future of the minor parties (Progressives, United Future, ACT, and NZ First) looked uncertain and grim.
There are two blocs – the Government and its support parties, and those in opposition. How could it be otherwise? But even within the opposition parties work still goes on in concert with National. For example, the Greens recently signed an agreement to work with National on some issues. And what of the Maori Party? Where do they sit? On some issues they are of the left, and on other issues on the right. Nor do I see any particular challenges to the existence of ACT (Rodney Hide will probably continue to hold Epsom), or United Future (Peter Dunne seems to have the ability to weather everything).

The report’s authors argue that FPP was in fact more representative:
Under FPP, the seats in Parliament did not reflect the national vote. However, the effective two-party system forced both parties to gravitate towards the centre. This way, political outcomes came close to representing the median voter’s preferences, and so it could be argued that FPP actually achieved a quasi-representative outcome.

Under MMP, a majority party enters into an agreement with one or more smaller parties after an election. So despite a Parliament being completely representative of the electorate, the actual policies tend to move further from the policy preferences of the average voter.
The reason we dumped FPP was the disgust many felt for political parties that professed to be of the centre, while pursuing radical policies. Take Labour in the ‘80s or National in the ‘90s. They were hardly parties of the centre, and the sense of betrayal the public felt over their performance led directly to the implementation of MMP.

So being more representative in theory means nothing if the party claiming to represent you has no checks on its ability to pursue an altogether different agenda.

And another thing to consider is that the governing party under MMP will look to align itself with a minority party that shares some of its values. As with the National-ACT arrangement, it may sometimes seem at times that the tail is wagging the dog, but if ACT really had its hands on power it would be selling off every asset that moved, slashing taxes and introducing competition into every aspect of the state's operations. We haven’t seen that.

So the report's analysis doesn’t bear much scrutiny.

Supposedly under FPP we’re more likely to get what we want from the parties we vote for.
In addition to this move away from the median voter, political outcomes also become less predictable. In a two-party FPP system, the winning party gets to implement its manifesto and can be held accountable for its promises. Under MMP, political results depend on negotiations between governing parties. What a voter eventually gets from a party may be quite different from what the party initially promised, cancelling the idea of representation of voter preferences.
But under FPP we didn’t get what we wanted. That is why the majority voted for a change in 1993.

The authors rely on materials published by the Business Roundtable to identify flaws in MMP. Not surprisingly the Business Roundtable is opposed to MMP, and many of its members led the fight against the introduction of it in 1993. Most of the Business Roundtable’s objections don’t stand close scrutiny, as they are based on untested and unproven assumptions about what is good for the markets and the economy. If MMP is bad for business, where is the evidence of a general downturn in the economy's performance since 1996?

The authors then argue that list MPs under MMP lack the status of electorate MPs.
In terms of legitimacy and understanding of MMP, there is still ‘a continuing perception that list MPs lack the status of their constituency colleagues,’ suggesting that the public are unsure about the role of list MPs and, consequently, do not value them as highly as their directly elected colleagues.
I’m not convinced this is an issue, or if this is an issue, that it is a major one for most people. I’m sure Michael Cullen would have been surprised to learn he lacked status in the last Parliament.

The authors reject that Parliament under FPP was not as representative of society as under MMP. But if you look at the make-up of Parliament today, compared with 20 years ago, it’s pretty obvious there have been massive changes in the rates of representation of women and minorities. Indeed, the authors use statistics to show that rates of representation have increased, but try to argue the opposite. It is also interesting that the 2008 election results were not taken into account by the authors. 2008 saw a number of MPs elected from the Pacific and Asian communities.

The proposals for an upper house reveal muddled thinking, and an overwhelming desire to ditch MMP in favour of something else, anything else. The authors know FPP won’t be tolerated, so they concoct a batty system involving a lower house with 79 electorate MPs and no list MPs, and with an upper house with 31 MPs elected on a proportional basis. Of course, the Maori seats go.

The authors assume that an upper house would provide a check on the powers of the government, ensuring that the worst aspects of FPP were avoided. And the proportionality of the upper house would enable minorities to be elected to Parliament. But there are a number of flaws with this analysis. The powers of the upper house would be limited. The upper house would only able to review legislation, rather than introduce it, and so most of the important legislative decisions would be made by a lower house elected on a FPP basis. That lower house would inevitably be much less representative of women and minorities. 

I don’t see a compelling argument for any kind of upper house. We might not always like the deals done under MMP, but at least the house is more representative and parties talk to each other. We no longer have three-year dictatorships.

There's no question that MMP could be improved. But none of the arguments expressed by the report’s authors are particularly convincing.

* the words “right wing” are probably redundant. When are think-tanks ever left wing?

Mr Hitler, That's Just Not Cricket!

So it turns out Adolf Hitler* was interested in cricket.
The future leader of Nazi Germany was taught the basics of the game by First World War POWs, BBC broadcaster John Simpson found.

But according to his new book about 20th century reporting, the corporation’s World Affairs Editor discovered the Fuhrer later became frustrated with the game’s complex rules and tried to rewrite the game’s laws.

He had “advocated the withdrawal of the use of pads” because the “artificial bolsters” were “unmanly and un-German”.
I'm not surprised. All the most notorious monsters of the last 100 years (Robert Mugabe, John Howard, John Major) have been keen on cricket.

Hitler challenged some British POWs to a game, though we don’t know who won.
Immediately after the end of the match, Hitler declared the game “insufficiently violent” for German Fascists.

“He had conned over (sic) the laws of cricket, which he considered good enough no doubt for pleasure-loving English people,” wrote Mr Locker-Lampson.

“But he proposed entirely altering them for the serious-minded Teuton.”

There was speculation that due to his contempt of the game, Hitler was dismissed for a “golden duck”, although this has never been confirmed.
It’s hard to imagine a more brutal game than old-time cricket. Up until the 1970s nobody wore much protective equipment. They didn’t wear helmets, so when someone bowled short stuff you really were in fear for your life. If you think I’m exaggerating read this story about the NZ cricket tour to South Africa in 1953.

Still, imagine if the Germans had picked up cricket, albeit a more violent version. It’s interesting to ponder the rule changes that might have been required:
  • Nobody would play for a draw any more. Total, crushing and complete victory would be the only possibility.
  • No more playing off the back foot. Get forward, you cowards!
  • Everyone would wear black.
  • Some fielding positions would have to change. Deformities such as short leg or long leg are not tolerated in the master race.
  • Wickets would be renamed “kills”.
  • The running by batsmen of twos or threes would be prohibited, because that would involve a return to where you hit the ball from. A good German soldier does not retreat.
  • Appeals to the umpire would involve gangs of armed thugs.
* Crap! Does this mean I have Godwinned myself in my own blog post?

Energy and Resources Minister In Fantasyland

A new challenger to Anne Tolley's "Worst Minister" title is emerging.

This is Gerry Brownlee, according to the Herald:
Regarding apparent anomalies in the estimated value of minerals in areas earmarked to be taken out of schedule four, he said it was "a bit like two cooks having an argument about how many dates are in the scones".
The scone analogy is a hopeless one. The argument isn't over how many dates there are in the scones. If there are no dates, or very few dates, the scones will still be edible. But if there are few or no minerals in some areas of the Conservation estate to be mined, the plan starts looking like a stinker that won't be worth the trouble or the reputational damage to the country.

To continue the hopeless analogy, this is more an argument about whether there is any flour in the scones.

And then this:
Mr Brownlee said he didn't accept criticism in The Economist magazine attacking New Zealand's green credentials.
Other mining activity on the conservation estate had been approved over the years and tourist numbers were up, and countries like Canada had historically traded on its green image while maintaining mining industries.
It's no surprise to learn Brownlee doesn't accept criticism.

But perhaps Brownlee could read this article by renowned environmentalist George Monbiot about the Canadian oil and mining industries. Clean and green? Not so much.

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Ten Things We Now Know About Mining The Conservation Estate


  1. The direct economic benefits to New Zealand from mining are at best uncertain. The numbers pedalled by National in favour of opening up Conservation lands to mining don't appear to stack up. The assumptions made about the value of these precious minerals are heroic at best. And let us not forget we don't actually know how many of these precious minerals there are. The Government figures are based on guesswork. 
  2. National must think the public are fools. Without any sense of shame, the Government today trotted out the same figures in favour of mining that others had demolished days ago. Maybe they thought nobody would notice.
  3. Nobody in Government has done any analysis of the potential damage that could be caused to New Zealand's image overseas. John Key (the Tourism Minister!) as much as admitted this in Parliament. The damage to New Zealand's tourism industry could be potentially devastating. Tourists come to New Zealand because they perceive it as being an unspoilt wilderness. Now we all know that's very far from the truth, but in tourism perception is everything. Being savaged by the Economist magazine is not what the industry needs.
  4. Some people (the usual suspects) are claiming there is a hidden agenda behind the moves to open up Conservation land to mining. I don't buy tales of hidden agendas and secret plans. Stupidity and blinkered ideology are usually perfectly adequate explanations for poor decision-making. Key and co aren't necessarily trying to reward their mining mates. They just don't give a shit about the things many others care passionately about - like the environment, conservation and our natural heritage.
  5. Opposition to these moves is growing steadily. I expect we will see a backdown of sorts. Maybe the plan will be scaled back or quietly dropped.  John Key needs to get a puppy, or smile more. Maybe then we won't notice.
  6. Gerry Brownlee is barely competent, and his arrogance is offensive. And he has no understanding of the opposition he is facing. He is not the man to sell this policy.
  7. Nobody believes the mining industry's claims that modern mining techniques are surgical.  The problem with any type of mining is that there is always going to be a big hole in the ground, and a great big pile of crap dug out that needs to be put somewhere.  And there need to be roads built as well. And a water source. And somewhere to put wastewater and machinery and trucks etc etc.
  8. If surgical mining is anything like surgical bombing, I strongly recommend that all wedding parties get the hell off Great Barrier Island before the miners start digging.
  9. Even if the mining industry can convince the public that mining can be done "surgically" (good luck on that), how can we be sure that the only mining operations allowed will be "surgical" ones? The Government's "just trust us" approach doesn't give me any comfort. And if the decision's to be left to the Environment Court, that leaves uncertainty.
  10. If this is National's plan to close the income gap with Australia, we're screwed.

Beneficiaries Lament The End Of The Dream

Welfare beneficiaries around the country were in shock and mourning today, after Social Development Minister Paula Bennett announced “the dream is over”.

Former bricklayer and now long-term unemployed man Chas “The Jazz” Murray was one of those struggling to cope with the news.

“Man I had it sweet, bro. I had the dream beneficiary lifestyle. You name it, I had me some of it.

“Bro, as soon as I mention to the ladies I’m on the dole they come running after me. I almost have to beat them off with a stick.

"The ladies just go crazy for a penniless man with depression, feelings of worthlessness and a greater chance of poor health outcomes.

“And you should see my sweet-as set of wheels. Pity I can’t afford a car to put them on.”

Invalids benefit recipient Adam Green has been battling cancer for the last three years. Now he will have to move onto a sickness benefit and prove he is not fit to work.

“They’ve been special times,” said Mr Green.

“Being racked with pain and nausea as the cancer eats into me, slowly sucking away every ounce of my dignity and destroying my family in the process, feeling like I just want to die and end the misery.

“Ah, those salad days.”

DPB recipient and mother of two pre-school children, Jocelyn O’Kane, said she dreaded the impending changes.

“Being a mother of small children is such a holiday,” she said. “I get out of bed most days at about midday and the kids have already changed their nappies, done the dishes, washed the clothes, got the groceries, vacuumed the floor, eaten breakfast, put the rubbish out, driven themselves to kindergarten, cooked the night’s meal, and paid the bills.

“So I just get a big bag of chips out of the pantry, put on Oprah and relax for the afternoon. I sure am going to miss those days."

In The Jury Room

From the Dom Post:
The Court of Appeal has talked of jurors consulting a ouija board during a trial and leaving deliberations to have sex.
Another juror who left the jury room screaming that they would not go back was grabbed and drawn back into the room, according to three judges.
I often wonder what really goes on in the jury room. But I'm not eligible to serve as a juror because of my profession.

I always miss out on the fun.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

The Welfare Crackdown Begins

The Government has today announced changes to welfare, in an effort to get people off unemployment and other benefits and into the workforce. The magic employment pixie will then take these people and find work for them all.

Of course, there are very few jobs for these people to go into. So you have to wonder what is behind the new measures. I suspect old-fashioned politics is at play – stamping down on bludgers will be popular with National's core constituency. It will also appeal to ACT. The Maori Party, the other support party for the Government, will probably just go “meh”, and wash their hands of the entire thing, because they got some half-arsed TV deal involving rugby, and aren’t the baubles of power quite nice?

The best way to get people off welfare is to grow the economy, so that new jobs are created. The Government cannot be blamed for the recession, but John Key’s response to the economic challenges posed by the downturn has been feeble. He’s made big promises (remember the jobs summit? the cycleway? meaningful tax reform?), but has so far delivered next to nothing of substance. His main focus appears to be the marginalisation of the underprivileged (tax cuts for the wealthy, "tough on crime" etc), in favour of the benefactors who helped him into power. He either has no vision for the nation's economy, or is keeping it a secret.

John Key says we can’t afford the millions spent on welfare. And yet we are told the nation can and must give the wealthiest members of society a tax cut.

For most people welfare is not a choice. Punitive measures may work in some cases, but the bulk of the people on benefits just want to work. In some cases (e.g. sickness or childcare responsibilities) they simply can’t work.

You have to wonder where this welfare debate is heading. How long will it be before someone (most probably an ACT MP) suggests  beneficiaries should even have the vote? Think that’s mad? Paul Quinn’s bill to disenfranchise prisoners may be the first step in that direction.

Attacking bludgers is a tried and true measure for National, and it has worked a treat in the past. And in Paula Bennett Key has an eager executioner. Who better to wield the knife that a former beneficiary? 

The Face Of Surgical Mining?

Postcard-Sized Hole On Eden Park Pitch Destroys Third Cricket Test

Controversy erupted today before the start of the third cricket test between New Zealand and Australia, when a large hole was discovered on the pitch.

Play was delayed for ten minutes this morning while the captains of the two teams argued with the umpires about what to do.

The hole was discovered by Eden Park head groundskeeper Mark Perham, just after he removed the covers this morning.

“I was shocked to find a rectangular hole in the middle of the pitch, “said Mr Perham. “I don’t know how it got there or who did this. This is an act of mindless vandalism.”

The hole, roughly the size of a postcard and about 15 centimetres deep, is located near the batting crease at the ASB Stand end of the pitch.

Australian captain Ricky Ponting said the hole would make it almost impossible for teams to bat safely or sensibly.

“The hole’s just on a length. If a ball hits the hole it could bounce up and hurt someone. This pitch is deadly.”

New Zealand captain Daniel Vettori agreed. “The pitch is ruined,” he told Sky TV. “We can’t play on this.”

But the objections of the captains were dismissed by the umpires and match officials. Umpire Terry Whiteside said the area was small and would not affect play. He ordered play to proceed.

And by lunch today Australia were in some difficulty.

Match update (lunch, day one):

Monday, March 22, 2010

Words That Must Be Banned

#1: Step-change

A sudden change in the value or size of something.

Used by business leaders and Government politicians to make insipid and mediocre measures sound risky and daring. 

Examples:

On the move to open up the Conservation estate to mining:
Business New Zealand chief executive Phil O'Reilly said the move could create a "step change" in the country's prosperity.
Nick Smith on the potential dissolution of Ecan:
We are not satisfied that we are managing these things well. There needs to be a step change.
John Key on the effect of tax reform:

 a "step change in the New Zealand economy"

On the broadband rollout:
Cabinet has signed off plans for the rollout of high speed broadband in rural areas - signifying what the Government has labelled a "major step change" in rural broadband.
Ban these two terrible words.

Right Thinking - Introducing Dr. Frank Shizenhausen

 Finally a conservative voice on Imperator Fish

You may think this blogsite is all just a laugh, but let me assure you that you could not be more wrong. In fact, I consider it my public duty to provide informative and balanced opinion and commentary.

But I've received a flood of emails* asking for a more conservative point of view, and for the views of the Right to be better represented on this blogsite.

These emails forced me to confront my own liberal biases. So that is why I recruited none other than the distinguished Dr. Frank Shizenhausen to contribute to this site.

I'm sure you know Dr. Shizenhausen's work, but let me recite some of his career highlights so far:
  • Studied at the prestigious University of Slough, where he graduated in Zoology with honours.
  • Completed masters and doctorate in Resource Management and Town Planning at Ulan Bator Tech.
  • Founder of the Centre for Research and Policy (CRAP), a policy think-tank that has influenced conservative movements in all corners of the Wairarapa region.
  • Keynote Speaker at last year's ARSE (Against Reason, Science and the Enlightenment) Annual Conference.
  • Third Runner Up in the Pams Baking Powder Columnist of the Year Award, 2008.
  • Bestselling Author of Common Cents: How Thinking Ruined The Economy.
And now here is the first of Frank's hard-hitting columns.

Scott

* I sent them myself, just to be sure they got to me.


If the Waihopai spybase trial tells us anything, it is that we must immediately abolish the claim of right defence.

It is simply intolerable that a jury of ordinary people, in a one-off case with unusual circumstances involving no harm to people, could have allowed this monstrous trio to go free. This verdict threatens all of us. Especially our children. And our domes.

John Key is right to compare this to the provocation debate we had a few months ago. We abolished the partial defence of provocation, so we can act quickly when we need to. Even though the provocation debate went on for years and years and was the subject of more than one Law Commission report. And even though the provocation defence was used in numerous cases with often troubling results. Yes, this is just like the provocation debate.

This case sets a precedent for any crackpot on a mission. By "precedent" I don’t mean a legal precedent, because anyone who isn’t a complete halfwit* knows jury decisions don’t have any precedent value at all. So when I wave the term “precedent-setting” about, just go with me. Don’t over-analyse everything. Over-analysing things is what got us into this mess into the first place.

Let’s also remember for a moment that these defendants were effectively articulate hippies. Nowadays, in this permissive society we live in, hippies are given the freedom to do as they please. But nobody every questions why this should be so. Why, in a country that is suffering an appalling child abuse epidemic, and where welfare dependency and violent crime are the norm for many, do we tolerate hippies at all?

Once upon a time someone who dressed differently to you and me would be stoned to death, or burned at the stake. We all know we can't go back to those glorious days, but isn't it tempting still to think of the society we left behind? Was slavery really that bad?

Contrast the fate of the Waihopai trio now with the sentence handed down to Stephen Versalko. He probably should have been less greedy, but at least he wore a collar in court. Six years seems a bit harsh, considering robbing from a bank is a victimless crime, because they just print some money when they need more of it, don't they?

Compare that with the damage the trio could have done to a nebulous and shadowy security apparatus whose machinations nobody but a select few really understand. Maybe the damage was only a pin-prick, but if you stick a pin in someone's eye that's got to be GBH.

The verdict forces us to face some uncomfortable facts. Is it time we abolished juries altogether? They can't be trusted to apply common sense any more. That's what happens when you let the elderly or unemployed dominate juries. 

But judges are a problem too, because they allow the chronic inefficiency of the system to fester into absurd results. The money we waste on the judicial system is obscene. If there was ever an area of the economy crying out for deregulation, surely this is it. If someone really wants their case to go before a judge and jury they should damn well pay for the privilege themselves.

And don't even get me started on legal aid. If you can't afford a lawyer, it's your own fault for spending so much time and money breeding like rabbits and smoking P. You people are all the same.

We simply cannot live in a society where juries are allowed to make up any kind of verdict they like. That provides uncertainty, and the markets hate uncertainty.

I say, I'm feeling rather faint. Damn liberals must have poisoned my water!

*Or a Prime Minister. Our PM is a busy man and can’t be expected to understand basic details of how the justice system works.

John Key Doesn't Rule Out Thinking About Looking Into Doing Something Perhaps


After months of being relaxed and prepared to consider various options, our PM has now upped the ante.

He is now prepared to not rule out changing the law on something.

This is the kind of bulldog attitude the people love. By that I mean a bulldog that has been drugged and who can't lift his legs off the ground.

The people love you, John. Just don't let them see you doing anything that might reveal you have a plan or a firm set of values to guide you. You can't be all things to all people unless you're prepared to bend every which way.

Sunday, March 21, 2010

Call That Tripe? I'll Show You Tripe!

Paul Holmes has written about why the Waihopai trio should have been found guilty:

I'll spare you the pain and summarise:
  • America should be allowed to act with impunity, because 9/11 was so awful, and American lives are more important than the lives of other miscellaneous foreign people.
  • The accused were scruffy looking.
He also believes all you have to do to get off a criminal damage charge is plead "claim of right", and the magic legal genie will do the rest.
Anyway, this coming week, I'm going to drive around our district putting sugar in the tanks of some of the biggest tractors I see working the neighbouring fields because they use too much diesel.

If I am charged I shall plead "claim of right" - I simply had to destroy the tractors because their carbon footprint threatens countless lives and, what's more, I really believe I have the law on my side to do so.
Wish I could be on that jury.

******

Meanwhile Kerre Woodham has finally revealed what we all suspected - she is a mole for US intelligence, an operative planted deep in the heart of the New Zealand media.

In today's column she wrote:
But one thing is for certain. All the tosh coming from these men about their non-violent action achieving significant things and saving the lives of the women and children in Iraq is just that - tosh.

Ripping a plastic dome in the peaceful valley of Waihopai hasn't prevented one drop of blood from being spilled in Iraq.
Nobody outside the intelligence community really knows what goes on in Waihopai, what the information gathered is used for, or what the effect on intelligence gathering the attack on the dome had. But Kerre knows. It's obvious - she's one of them.

******

Finally, a message to the newspaper that hired the abovementioned two.

So, Herald on Sunday, how do I get me some of this column-writing? I can write similar tripe in record time, and if the money is good I too can be unprincipled, forgetful of previously contradictory positions taken on major issues, and angry as hell. "It just isn't right!" See?

Call me. You know I can save your bacon.

Another Law And Order Beat-Up

The Herald must have got bored of flags and union with Australia, because it has returned to a familiar theme.

The headline today proclaims CRIMINALS RUN RIOT ON PAROLE.  You could be forgiven for worrying whether the riot is coming your way, and whether you ought to lock your door. I did hear a bit of noise last night before I went to bed, but just figured that was someone having a party a few doors down. Perhaps it was the criminal mob sharpening their knives and getting high, preparing for the reaping. Should I leave the house or just stay home cowering in fear?

Anyway, the article says:
Forty-three of the country's most dangerous criminals have been convicted of serious violent offences committed while they were already on parole for vicious crimes.

Corrections Department figures obtained by the Herald on Sunday show that as recently as last year, two offenders were sentenced to unlimited prison terms, called preventive detention, for crimes committed when they were released early.
43 sounds like a lot, but is it? The article does not say over what period the 43 were convicted. Was it over ten years? Five? Nor does the article say how many people were on parole during that period. Why was this basic information not included? As an exercise in sensational reporting the article succeeds admirably. But if the purpose of the story is to provide useful information, it fails miserably.

So, while the story presents a picture of criminals out of control, it offers little evidence to prove the point. So I can't help but think "beat up".

That doesn't mean we don't have a violent crime problem in this country. And of course for a victim of any one of the 43 offenders it wouldn't matter how many others there were. But the fact people commit crimes while on parole should surprise nobody. There is plenty of evidence that prison doesn't work well as a rehabilitative measure, so why wouldn't violent people be committing crimes upon their release?

We will always have to endure these horrible stories about people on parole hurting or killing others - unless of course we ensure nobody gets parole. But that isn't realistic or desirable. If we don't let people out of prison early, we would be taking away any incentive for them to behave or reform themselves. Nor could our jails cope with the increased prison population.

So, anyway, let's play the Herald on Sunday's game and agree these figures show there is a crisis in the parole system. What do these figures then mean? They would suggest that prison does not successfully rehabilitate most people. And forget the deterrence argument, because if deterrence worked you would think the people who've been punished would be the last ones to commit further crimes. If imprisoning people doesn't deter or rehabilitate, then the only reasons to imprison are to punish and to keep dangerous people off the streets.

So if we as a society are not prepared to countenance any risk of offenders committing further crimes upon their release from prison, we must lock them up forever. Every single one of them.

Alternatively, we could just accept that the system isn't perfect, and never will be, and that people sometimes reoffend. Does that sound too hard?

Saturday, March 20, 2010

Review: TV3's The Nation

I watched the premiere of The Nation this morning. It has been held out as TV3's answer to TVNZ's Q+A, but the style is different, and it presents a distinct alternative to the traditional current affairs interview show.

I had wondered about the choice of Jason Gunn as presenter, but his relaxed manner seems to put the contestants at ease. Some of his dance moves aren't as sharp as they could be, but when you're up against someone as nimble-footed as Transport Minister Stephen Joyce, you're always going to look second rate.

But the star of the show was his co-host Nicky Watson. Her encyclopedic knowledge of taxation law had Revenue Minister Peter Dunne on the back foot right from the beginning. Thankfully he saved his best until last, finishing strongly with a triple somersault backflip, a move that saw him awarded a 9.8 by the judges.

If I had to identify one major flaw with the show, it would be the overabundance of ponies. Sure, we all like the cute little things, but there were so many of them on set jostling and nudging each other that it made it almost impossible to see the finale. And what a finale! Rodney Hide won the pie-eating contest, but was pipped by his caucus colleague Heather Roy in the triathlon.

I may watch the show again, provided next time Jason Gunn puts some pants on.

Friday, March 19, 2010

Come To New Zealand – We’re A Soft Touch

We’re being bombarded with tales of financiers duping investors. Today we learn that the Securities Commission is pursuing the directors of Capital + Merchant Finance. Yesterday it was announced Capital + Merchant and other finance companies were to be investigated by the Serious Fraud Office.

Also, yesterday investment adviser Stephen Versalko was sentenced to six years for defrauding investors of almost $18 million. He’ll probably be out in four.

Just over a week ago we learned that the directors of failed finance company Hanover Finance were up to their old tricks again.

Meanwhile people like Rod Petricevic and Mark Bryers continue to enjoy lives of comfort while many of the people their companies cleaned out wonder how they will pay for their retirements.

This has become a crisis, and the next couple of years are likely to see a flood of similar cases.

This crisis affects the entire country, not just the small investors who lost everything. Trust in the capital markets is at an all-time low, and that means people will be wary about trusting anyone who is looking for capital funding. That’s a problem, because if we are to grow the economy we need new businesses, and those businesses will need capital. People need to have confidence that when they invest in an enterprise they won’t be robbed blind. At the moment they don't.

Because we're a soft touch for crooks, shysters and snake-oil salesmen. We lack serious regulation, or if regulation exists it isn't being adequately enforced.

But what can be done? The Capital Markets Taskforce recommended a range of sensible measures about disclosure obligations to investors. They would certainly help. But if we are to get a handle on this issue we need to think about implementing a range of additional measures. Two of them ought to be no-brainers:
  • Tougher penalties for people who commit financial offences in the future. If there is any area of the law where tougher sentences might have a deterrent value, it is in the financial crimes area. Offenders are usually smart and well-educated, and their crimes usually take a large amount of planning and time. They are more likely to be circumspect if one of their own gets hammered.
  • Commit vastly more resources into the SFO, Securities Commission and other enforcement agencies. If we are to see an improvement in public confidence in the capital markets we need these agencies to move quickly and forcefully. At present they have a huge backlog of investigation and enforcement work, and it may be years before some of the people they are investigating ever face the consequences of their actions. The Capital Markets Taskforce recommended that some of the regulatory functions currently spread across a range of agencies be centralised within only a couple of agencies, and that idea has merit.
And then there’s the “wishlist” – that’s the stuff we probably all agree ought to happen, but which isn't so easy to implement.
  • Make it harder for people convicted of financial offences to shelter their assets in trusts and other entities. Great idea, hard to implement. There are many perfectly good reasons for people to have trusts.
  • Make it easier to claw back assets or property obtained from the proceeds of crime. But this is an area of law already fraught with difficulty.
  • Require promoters to have to disclose their past business failings in any investment disclosure documents. That's easy to say, but what counts as a failure? What if it isn't the person's fault?
  • Change the law so that complex fraud cases can be tried by a judge only. The SFO has a hard time trying financial crime cases, because they usually involve complex fact situations. For those cases it is probably more appropriate for a judge, or a panel of judges, to be deciding on guilt or innocence. There has been some movement in this area, but it may be necessary to extend the power to dispense with a jury.
  • Create a new range of financial offences, to capture the shysters and bad guys. Great. So how, and which ones?
Have I missed anything? Do you agree with my list?

What's Our Next Clever Plan?

The plan to sledge Aussie cricketer Michael Clarke in order to unsettle him worked brilliantly, didn't it?

For Australia.

WTF Mr Key?

John Key has been talking about whaling again, and about the differences between Australia’s response to Japanese whaling and our own.

From the Kaikoura Star:
But Mr Key said New Zealand was "not in a different position to Australia". 
Commercial whaling "might be acceptable if it was acceptable to others", he said.
So here’s a Friday morning test for you. Which parts of Key’s statements:
  • are factually incorrect?
  • contradict previous statements by Key about our commitment to end commercial whaling?
  • contradict statements made by Murray McCully?
  • make no logical sense?
You just can’t satirise this stuff.

Thursday, March 18, 2010

More On That Acquittal

Here's a fact that many people seem unable to grasp about the acquittal of the "Waihopai Three":*

Jury verdicts do not have any precedent value.

It's quite a simple fact to grasp. Another jury could have just as easily found the trio guilty on all charges. There would be nothing stopping a jury from doing so if an identical case were being decided tomorrow.

* By "many people", I am referring to other people in the blogosphere (e.g. Kiwiblog). The verdicts are so fresh that the only hysterical responses to it I've seen are on the Internet.

John's Diary 18/3/10

Not a bad few days.

We just got rid of a whole lot more civil servants. Isn't my plan to get Kiwis working looking great? It all comes back to my cycleway - that's 1500 more people on their bikes!

Now the lousy Opposition are saying we agreed to cap public service staff levels, not cut them.  But Maybe I wasn't as clear as I could have been. What I meant to say was we intend to knee-cap the public service. There goes me and my garbled words again. But the proles love me for it. LOL!

Talking of which, didn't I draw a nice Beehive picture? It even had a lovely little bee buzzing about. I wanted to draw a pair of circling Nazgul too, but Murray and Steven didn't have time to pose. LOL!

I've just announced I'll give $300K to the All Whites. I was pleased to help my support party out, until I found out the "All Whites" weren't a division of the Act Party. Who watches soccer anyway? It's hardly going to get me another gig on Letterman. Nor are the 2018 Commonwealth Games. What a waste of non-rugby-related taxpayer's money.

People are complaining because I'm being secretive about our conservation mining plans. I keep telling them to trust me. I tell them "don't worry", because my experts say any mining will be done surgically. I didn't dare tell them the advice my experts gave me made no sense. So I asked Gerry how feasible it would be to extract minerals using only scalpels, anaesthetics and clamps. He just patted me on the back and said "keep smiling, John"

Good advice, that.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Surprising Verdicts

The not guilty verdicts handed down to the Waihopai spy-base accused surprised me. I thought the case was desperately unwinnable for the accused.

But that was because I was thinking like a lawyer. Had a judge been deciding on the guilt or innocence of the accused I suspect the result would have been very different. Of course, jury trials don't get decided by lawyers or judges.

And that isn't a criticism of the jury system. The lawyer may shake his head in wonder, but juries exist to apply a "common touch" to the law. The jury represents the views of the community. The accused trio obviously convinced twelve members of the community that what they did was justified, and good on them for doing so.

However, the case raises some interesting questions. Will it empower protest groups to break the law? Or is this really just a one-off case whose facts were unique?

I expect many willl now call for the entire jury system to be abolished. Just like after the Bain case. We're a vindictive lot. We only ever complain when someone walks away.

Value For Money?

When Does The Next Flight To Pyongyang Leave?

I'm warming to the idea of living in a totalitarian state. Although I'm still having trouble with the bit about being hauled away for no reason and never being seen again.


But would the quality of the news reportage be any worse?

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Labour Politician Caught Being Gay

The Labour MP at the centre of controversy today said he had no regrets about his behaviour and would do it again.

Charles Chauvel was reportedly about his business recently when an incident of his being gay allegedly occurred.

The alleged incident was reported on a right wing blogsite. Comments on that site claimed Chauvel had been gay.

Witnesses have confirmed the blogger's story. One person, who would not give his name, because he doesn't actually exist, said "He has been totally gay."

But Chauvel said he has no regrets. "It's not an offence to be gay, you know."

However, political commentators believe Chauvel's actions, in being gay, could count against him.

Prominent internet commentator Deirdre Ferrera said the Labour MP's arrogance would not go unnoticed in his electorate.

"People are sick to death of this sense of entitlement some politicians carry with them. What gives these people the right to be gay? I've nothing against gayness itself, but we don't elect our politicians to be gay. The arrogance of the man is breathtaking."

Chauvel would not respond to questions today from media about whether he would give up being gay.

Who's The Bigger Racist?

The Race Relations Commissioner’s report on the Hone Harawira incident is worth a read. The Commissioner Joris de Bres has been criticised by Muriel Newman and others this week for failing to take any action against Harawira. And Newman has launched a general attack on the Office and claimed it compounds racism and is a waste of money.

But when you read the report, you realise that de Bres really has very little power to do anything. So what exactly were they wanting him to do? Condemn the language used by Harawira? He did that. Prosecute him? He has no power to. Kick Harawira out of Parliament? Again, he has no power.

Muriel Newman has been writing and talking a lot about race relations lately. You may wonder why we should give two hoots what one of the crazier ex-MPs of a loopy political party thinks about Maori. After all, there never has been a shortage of crazy people ready to opine on race relations. But Newman seems to have drawn to her a number of prominent people in the business community (I will explore these links in a future post). Her views on race may be odious, but they appear to have the support of many on the right.

Newman seems to believe we live in a society where people are already treated equally, and where discrimination does not exist. This opinion should not surprise anyone. Newman represents the views of a small minority at the very top end of society, people with money and privilege who don’t want others telling them what they can do. She dresses up this call to selfishness as an equality issue, by describing the institutions that exist to promote and protect the vulnerable, the Human Rights Commission and Race Relations Commission, as “promoting racial superiority and separatism”. Newman says those institutions are a waste of money and ought to be abolished.

Newman will readily acknowledge that Maori and other ethnic groups are over-represented in crime and prison population statistics. But she says this has nothing to do with racial inequality.
For the race relations watchdog to try to blame the fact that Maori commit over half of the crimes serious enough to land them in jail on racism is a complete and utter cop-out.
Newman identifies a number of other reasons why Maori fail – poor education, alcohol and drug problems, poor health and welfare dependency. But she refuses to acknowledge a racial link to these factors. And that is where the flaws in her argument stand out.

Because it just doesn’t make sense to say racial inequality has nothing to do with these problems, when the statistics themselves show that Pakeha do better. Maori and Pakeha have been living side by side for generations. If racial inequality does not exist, why are Maori not doing just as well?

It follows then that if you don’t believe racial inequality exists, or that our societal structure (largely based on European values) plays some part in disadvantaging Maori, you must have to believe Maori are lazy and stupid. Because what other explanation is there?

Is that what Newman is so carefully trying to dance around? It might explain why she is so hostile to Maori, and to institutions designed to represent them. Newman’s support of the nonsensical theory that the Celts and Chinese arrived in New Zealand before Maori (her "expert" Gavin Menzies has been widely discredited) might also be motivated in part by this hostility.

To pretend that racism doesn’t adversely affect minorities is to ignore the bleedingly obvious. It is as laughable as the claims frequently made about “Maori privilege”. Those claims are usually made by people who enjoy the privileges most Maori can only dream of.

"Why Is Modern Music So Tuneless?"

In breaking news, a person has complained about noisy kids.

The full (gasp!) shocking story is here.

And here are some of the latest shocking developments to this story:
  • a man has complained because another vehicle didn't indicate
  • I don't like those tattoos
  • a shopkeeper has grumbled because a rude patron didn't say 'thank you"
  • someone has called talkback radio to moan about something-or-other
  • an irate elderly man has said loudly to his bowls partner that young people need a spell in the army to sort themselves out
  • Why don't those people just get a job?
  • Why don't the news media report actual news?

Farewell He Pingping

The world's smallest man is dead.

I remember watching a documentary a few months back about He Pingping's quest to prove to the Guinness World Records people that he was indeed the smallest man in the world.

I also remember he smoked like an industrial chimney. No wonder he died young.

Crazy Sciencey Types At It Again!

Them crazy scienticians are always making stuff up.

Like the whole global warming thing. Thanks but no thanks. I don’t need science-persons to tell me what our planet is doing. How can the Earth be warming when it’s actually quite cool today?

No, sir, if I want my climate science I’ll listen to the corporate lobbyists, resource management lecturers and town planners who know their stuff.

Now those crazy cats are saying that share trading may actually prompt heart attacks.

That’s the most ludicrous thing I’ve ever heard. How can buying shares, then desperately selling them under enormous stress for much less than the price you bought them for, because you’re a fool who wouldn’t know a good investment from a hot curry roll, endanger one’s heart? It’s all a bit of harmless fun, innit?

Do these clever learned-type-persons mean to tell us that when people get cleaned out financially they may actually suffer health problems?

If that were the case, then we would probably have to conclude that the people behind such fine institutions as Blue Chip, Hanover and Bridgecorp were responsible for the deaths of many, especially the elderly and inform who put their life savings in those ventures. We would even have to go as far as to say they have blood on their hands.

Which would be as preposterous as believing we are descended from monkeys.

Newsflash - Cameron Slater Is A Dick

This is funny:
Labour MP Chris Carter has a watertight response to a claim he has used taxpayer funds to pay his mother's phone bill. She died 17 years ago.
Mr Carter has been at the centre of expenses controversies at Parliament because of large travel bills he notched up as a minister. 
Blogger Cameron Slater on his Whaleoil website has been merciless in his portrayal of Mr Carter as a "trougher".

On a posting about the telephone allegation, Mr Slater portrays the Te Atatu MP with a pig's nose.

Referring to Mr Carter as "Koru Club", Mr Slater says the politician is "still suffering from the delusions of grandeur which occur with advanced sufferers of entitle-itis".

"Only just recently, in the last couple of months, has his mother had her phone, tolls and internet bills transferred from Telecom [the Parliamentary Service and Ministerial Services telecommunications contract holder] to her own account at Slingshot.

"Now with her good and loyal son not able to sup quite so often at the trough, she has had to move to having to pay for it herself."

Mr Carter said yesterday that his mother, Maureen, had died in 1993. Even after letting the blog site know that, it suggested he had funded someone else pretending to be his mother.

He said he found the allegations in poor taste. "I'm completely incredulous. Usually these things have a little germ of truth, but there just doesn't seem to be any basis for the story at all."
What a dick.

Monday, March 15, 2010

National Standards Explained

An interview with Education Minister Anne Tolley

Imperator Fish:  Thank you for agreeing to be interviewed, Minister. So tell me why you think National Standards are so important. Is it worth all the drama and grief you're getting?

Anne Tolley:  I don't know what you mean. Everyone is in favour of them, apart from a few disgruntled teachers.

IF:  There's a perception people don't clearly understand National Standards. Can you shed any light on that?

Tolley:  Look, they are perfectly simple. The people of this country aren't fools. Why do you and others continue to treat parents like imbeciles?

IF:  Well perhaps you could explain to me how they work. 

Tolley:  Oh, ah... right then...well...um... there went in two and two unto Noah into the ark, the male and the female, as God had commanded Noah.

IF:  Pardon?

Tolley: Riverrun, past Eve and Adam’s, from swerve of shore to bend of bay, brings us by a commodius vicus of recirculation back to Howth Castle and Environs.

IF: Minister, you're making no sense...

Tolley: What? Did not that most illustrious man, Publius Scipio, the Pontifex Maximus, in his capacity of a private citizen, put to death Tiberius Gracchus, though but slightly undermining the constitution? And shall we, who are the consuls, tolerate Catiline, openly desirous to destroy the whole world with fire and slaughter? For I pass over older instances, such as how Caius Servilius Ahala with his own hand slew Spurius Maelius when plotting a revolution in the state. There was—there was once such virtue in this republic, that brave men would repress mischievous citizens with severer chastisement than the most bitter enemy. For we have a resolution of the senate, a formidable and authoritative decree against you, O Catiline; the wisdom of the republic is not at fault, nor the dignity of this senatorial body. We, we alone,—I say it openly, —we, the consuls, are waiting in our duty.  

IF:  If you're not going to answer a simple question-

Tolley:  Home had never been a very pleasant place to me, because of my sister's temper. But, Joe had sanctified it, and I had believed in it. I had believed in the best parlour as a most elegant saloon; I had believed in the front door, as a mysterious portal of the Temple of State whose solemn opening was attended with a sacrifice of roast fowls; I had believed in the kitchen as a chaste though not magnificent apartment; I had believed in the forge as the glowing road to manhood and independence. Within a single year, all this was changed. Now, it was all coarse and common, and I would not have had Miss Havisham and Estella see it on any account.

IF:  Minister, I must insist-

Tolley:  From a lofty perch Tarzan viewed the village of thatched huts across the intervening plantation. He saw that at one point the forest touched the village, and to this spot he made his way, lured by a fever of curiosity to behold animals of his own kind, and to learn more of their ways and view the strange lairs in which they lived.

IF: None of that makes any sense. Can you explain them to me in layman's terms?

Tolley:  I just did. But here's the dumbed down version, since you clearly don't get it: "God be praised," said the Reverend Commandant, "since he is a German I will hear what he has to say; let him be brought to my arbor." Now do you get it?

IF: Please stop.

Tolley:  Reason Defined Out of all which we may define, (that is to say determine,) what that is, which is meant by this word Reason, when wee reckon it amongst the Faculties of the mind. For Reason, in this sense, is nothing but Reckoning (that is, Adding and Substracting) of the Consequences of generall names agreed upon, for the Marking and Signifying of our thoughts; I say Marking them, when we reckon by our selves; and Signifying, when we demonstrate, or approve our reckonings to other men. Have you had enough yet?

IF: Yes.