The People's Prime Minister

An Imperator Fish exclusive

He's a fan of German philosophy and Voltaire, but doesn't like the historical legacy of the Austro-Hungarian Empire.

Prime Minister John Key took a couple of hours out of his busy schedule today to talk exclusively with Imperator Fish readers.

Key mixed talk of policy with some personal observations during his chat.

He confirmed that education would be at the centre of National's policy platform in next year's election. It is no secret that Key is an ardent admirer of the Neoplatonists, but it had been expected that National's education policy would focus on the Middle Platonist period.

Instead, Key announced that the entire focus of National Standards would be on the teachings of Plotinus and Iamblichus, and other prominent members of the Neoplatonist group.

The Prime Minister also admitted that he had little time for television, but that when he watched television he wanted something "big and dumb" to turn his brain off. His favourites include the Arts Channel and his DVD collection of the works of Swedish filmmaker Vilgot Sjöman.

Key also revealed that most Cabinet meetings include discussions of wider philosophical issues, such as whether justified true belief is knowledge, whether government policy should take into account the difficult question of moral luck, and whether the spots on Paula Bennett's leopard-skin outfit would still be the same colour next Monday.

He also confirmed that the three things he could not do without were his pocketbook of inspiring Jean-Paul Satre sayings, the good-luck charm given to him by a Tibetan monk during Key's three-year meditative retreat in the Himalayas, and his case of 1787 Chateau Lafite.

Finally, Key revealed that he had no appetite for a political role after being Prime Minister.

"Obviously if there was a position of philosopher king available I'd take a look. But I think I'm much more likely to be interested in writing a thesis on the role of anti-Semitism in the collected works of Fyodor Dostoevsky.

"I'd also like to play more golf."

Just Don't Ask Me

I was not overly surprised to learn that right wing mag Trans Tasman thinks so highly of various National MPs, and is generally dismissive of anyone in Opposition. I haven't read the magazine, because I can't be arsed paying for content, so am going on what The Press has reported.

Simon Power

Justice and Commerce Minister Simon Power is given top equal marks by the magazine, scoring 9 out of 10 along with the PM. But Power is given the title politician of the year because he gets stuff done, which is a ridiculous achievement. I would be more interested in looking at the quality of the man's work, rather than the volume of his output.

So let's examine the quality of some of Power’s achievements:

• Riding roughshod over centuries of jurisprudence by proposing sweeping changes to the rights of defendants in some criminal trials. I can almost hear Power saying in his assuring no-nonsense tone: “frankly it’s a bit silly in a modern society that defendants should have any rights at all.”
• Seeking desperately to change the law on the claim of right after one ”bad” case.
• Rushing through changes to the law on provocation (admittedly after a string of bad cases). Changing the law may well have been the right call, but it was done in a way that removed consultation, and ignored the views of the Law Society.
• Demanding the Law Commission examine internet laws immediately after the Cameron Slater case (despite the judgment rendered by Judge Harvey being a pretty exhaustive review of those laws).
• Speaking at this year’s Sensible Sentencing Trust conference, held at Parliament’s Banquet Hall, and talking in support of the SST’s work (maybe instead of Justice Minister he should be called Minster of Retribution)
• Completely rejecting any suggestion of relaxing drug laws, despite the recommendations of the Law Commission, and refusing to even countenance debate on the issue.
• Attacking the legal aid system at every opportunity.

Power’s attitude is that he knows best. His style is largely reactive (i.e. fly into a panic to change the law when there’s a decision he doesn’t like), and he doesn’t appear to favour consultation. Being a know-all may well be a fine achievement, but there's no indication as yet that Power possesses a legal intellect of genius.

Unfortunately legislating in haste means repenting at leisure. Badly drafted, rushed laws often cause more problems than they solve (witness the attempt by the witless Paul Quinn to change the law on prisoner voting rights by proposing to give back the vote to many prisoners who have lost it). When it comes to law and order and issues of justice, experience tells us that there are very rarely any quick fixes or easy victories. We ought to move slowly, cautiously, and with the weight of good evidence behind us.

Power is energetic and has done some good things. But he needs to slow down and listen to the advice of those who know more than him.

The others rated

It’s no surprise that Paul Quinn and Chris Carter get bottom marks in the Trans Tasman scorecard, or that Pansy Wong is close behind. But why does Rodney Hide do better this year than last? He has been an utter disaster in charge of ACT in 2010, and the majority of his caucus have performed little better. The only two who come out of the year with any sort of credibility are Hilary Calvert (too new to do anything bonkers) and John Boscawen (bonkers but likeable and largely harmless).

It is possible that the authors of Trans Tasman are allowing prejudices to interfere with their vote. Why does Hone Harawira do so badly? He may not be most people’s cup of tea, but it’s also possible to argue that Harawira is more representative of Maoridom than the sell-outs who currently lead the Maori Party. He speaks his mind, even if he lacks polish, and even if we whiteys don’t like a lot of what he says.

Brian Edwards is now asking readers to rate five MPs out of ten. I won't participate, mainly because such exercises always reveal my tendency to go negative. Ask me about our worst politicians and I’d spout a list a mile long (e.g. almost everyone in ACT, Pansy Wong, Paul Quinn, Sandra Goudie, Gerry Brownlee, Chris Carter, Pete Hodgson). Ask me who I think is actually doing a great job and I will struggle. I’m sorry, but I’m just a negative pr*ck.

Bitter Brash And The ACT Answer

A clearly embittered and disgruntled Don Brash has spoken to a group of National Party members at Orewa about how the government of John Key has disappointed him.

The increasingly embarrassing former National Party leader appears to have taken personally the dismissal by almost everyone of his 2025 Taskforce work. He possibly expected more support from the party he used to lead, though being the failed politician he is he is completely unable to see that his economic prescription is totally unsaleable.

Brash's nutty solution to the problem of catching up with Australia by 2025 (slash taxes, slash spending, slash regulation, sell sell sell – all the things the Australians didn’t do) has been dismissed as too radical by many, which frankly is a kindness to the man. I’d have gone a step further and said “too crazy” rather than "too radical", but then I’m a blogger and nasty bloggers get all the publicity.*

Brash also appears to have a problem with those brown people who were here before Pakeha. I'm not sure exactly why he should be so eager to join in the kicking of Maori, and I'm always reluctant to use the "r" word. But Brash's return to the politics of race is troubling.

The Don Brash story in the Sunday Star Times would probably have been more powerful had the journalist not described Chris Trotter as a "leading political commentator". The fact of the matter is that Chris Trotter and Don Brash are kindred spirits when it comes to dealing with those natives. Trotter’s worrying views on Maori mean he is happy to talk up the influence of Don Brash, even though the man ought to be regarded by all card-carrying socialists as the Antichrist.

The SST article also mentions the leaking of a memo from National MP Allan Peachey, expressing concern about the influence of the ACT Party on the debate around the Marine and Coastal Area Bill. But the concern expressed by Peachey was probably no more than crocodile tears. Is this Allan Peachey the same Allan Peachey who writes columns for former ACT MP Muriel Newman's right-wing thinktank the NZ Centre for Political Research? In case you've forgotten, Newman is one of the founders of the Coastal Coalition. You might have seen some of their divisive billboards around accusing John Key of giving our lands away to the greedy Maoris.

The convenient leaking of the Peachey memo just before a speech by Brash on race relations could of course be a coincidence.

The Herald also reports that Labour leader Phil Goff has said Brash should put a party forward and test whether the public supports his views. But that's absurd: why go to all the trouble of launching a new party when every aspect of your ideology fits so squarely within an existing party? I'm sure a struggling ACT Party would be delighted to have Dr Brash

* I have been told that my splenetic rant about Garth McVicar got a mention in this week’s Herald on Sunday (I haven't bothered to buy a copy, because I find that the tabloid sized pages don't work as well as full sized ones as weed matting for my garden). Why is it that the posts I spit out in five minutes get all the attention, while the carefully crafted ones get ignored? I can only assume it is because the media likes shouty bloggers. Maybe I should just TURN CAPS LOCK ON AND LEAVE IT ON FOR ALL OF MY BLOG POSTS!

Violence Mars Santa Parade Again

Organisers of the Auckland Santa Parade are reported to be considering cancelling future parades, after an incident ruined the annual event for families.

The event attracts up to a quarter of a million people, but in the last few years a number of incidents have ruined the enjoyment of the spectacle for many.

According to witnesses, a bottle was thrown at the final float in the parade, Santa's Sleigh, just as the float reached the bottom of Queen Street at about 3:30pm yesterday.

Television footage that aired last night showed the man playing the part of Santa Claus leaping from the float and charging into a crowd of children and parents, apparently trying to get to the person who threw the bottle.

A brawl involving Santa, children, parents and police then followed. The brawl was eventually broken up by police, with the aid of a Chinese cultural group involved with the parade. Members of the cultural group reportedly disarmed brawlers using high kicks and other martial arts techniques.

Police today confirmed that several people were arrested after the fight, and that a number of those arrested were in possession of weapons, including knives, handguns, fighting sticks and chainsaws.

Timmy Brown, aged eight, described what happened.

"I saw Santa running towards me. I thought he was going to give me a big hug, but instead he knocked me over. Now I've got a broken arm. I'm sorry I was such a naughty boy this year, Santa."

Parade organisers would not confirm the name of the man playing the role of Santa Claus, whom police arrested. But last night police named him as Vincent Wylie, sickness beneficiary. Police also confirmed that Mr Wylie is a member of the Mongrel Mob. They confirmed that a number of other gang members were arrested during the incident yesterday, and that the fight appeared to be gang-related.

Organisers of the parade had little to say about the disruption yesterday, although they did admit it cast doubt on the future of the event. But an inside source said that the incident stemmed from a refusal by organisers to allow a Black Power float to join the parade.

Black Power spokesman Jerome Smith said that the gang had approached organisers asking for a place in the parade, but had been refused.

"They said they didn't want no gangs involved," said Mr Smith.

"We told them that was bullshit, because the main float of the parade was all decked out in the colours of our rivals, but they said it was just a coincidence.

"It turns out the guy playing Santa was one of the Mongrel Mob's top men."

Mr Smith denied that Black Power deliberately disrupted the event.

"Nah, bro, I don't know nothing about that," said Mr Smith.

This is not the first incident to ruin the event for spectators, and other Auckland Santa Parades have been the target of disruptions.

Last year's event was marred by a terror attack when Islamic extremists disguised as bagpipers seized control of one of the floats. On that occasion swift intervention by the SAS allowed the event to continue after a delay to remove the bodies of the extremists and spectators who were killed.

And in 2007 the parade was effectively ambushed by another parade, led by adult entertainment entrepreneur Steve Crow. Motorbikes and convertible cars carrying naked women became intermingled with Christmas floats, much to the horror of parents of young children looking on.

But Auckland Mayor Len Brown, who took part in yesterday's parade and also the brawl, said he did not want to see the event cancelled.

"It is an Auckland tradition. Every year we have problems, but people keep coming back. People are mature enough to know that in any public event like this one you're going to get a few incidents.

"And this year the number of people stabbed to death by parade participants was only thirty-five. That's a record low."

Is Garth McVicar Losing It? #2

Fresh from making a tit of himself by attacking the Police Commissioner, the Sensible Sentencing Trust's Garth McVicar has spoken in support of child-killer Bruce Emery.

In case you have forgotten, Emery found a 15 year old tagging his property, chased him down the road with a knife, then stabbed him to death.

Emery claimed self-defence, but the jury didn't buy it, and he was convicted of manslaughter. In only getting manslaughter he was fortunate, and he was also lucky in the sentence he got: four years and three months.

But according to McVicar Emery should never have gone to jail.

"I didn't think he should have gone to jail," said Mr McVicar.

"That young offender [Pihema] had been doing graffiti before and Emery had been becoming extremely frustrated with it.

McVicar is all over the place. He wants criminal offenders to be nailed, but when the offender is a middle aged white man (as was his mate David Garrett), it seems the rules are different.

It is interesting to speculate what Mr McVicar's response might have been had Emery been a Polynesian man in his 20s.

Is Garth McVicar Losing It?

Garth McVicar, the head of the Sensible Sentencing Trust, is looking increasingly desperate and marginalised.

Having already been humiliated for vouching for disgraced former MP David Garrett, McVicar has now taken a pop at the Police Commissioner. This has drawn the return fire of Labour.

John Hartevelt of Stuff reports:

A bitter spat has broken out after Sensible Sentencing Trust spokesman Garth McVicar called for the head of Police Commissioner Howard Broad.

Labour MP Clayton Cosgrove this morning condemned McVicar for what he said amounted to a ''crass and insensitive attack'' on Broad.

Cosgrove said McVicar's attack, which was over comments about rethinking who is sent to prison, were unbelievable given what police were going through following the tragedy at the Pike River coal mine.

McVicar yesterday said Broad should resign immediately over his comments to MPs at parliament on Wednesday. At a select committee hearing, Broad indicated police were trying to prevent crime rather than focus solely on prosecuting.

It's nice to see Labour finally standing up to McVicar. His influence on the criminal justice system has done nothing to reduce crime. The violent crime stats continue to be negative. His supporters demand retribution and punishment over rehabilitation and prevention, but we've been punishing for years and it doesn't seem to be working. We know that a stint in jail doesn't make most people better citizens. In fact, many come out much more hardened criminals than when they went inside.

The police are at the very front end of dealing with crime. If they are now saying it is time to focus on prevention, why shouldn't we listen? And why exactly is crime prevention such an evil? Does McVicar actually want crimes to be committed? Perhaps McVicar fears irrelevance. Imagine if the police practised prevention and it actually worked. Who would we talk about hanging then?

The sooner McVicar's pernicious influence over law and order matters disappears the better.

The Alaskan Candidate

This is what Sarah Palin said on Glenn Beck's radio show:

We've got to stand with our North Korean allies.

Too soon, Sarah! You're not in the White House yet. You're ruining Kim's master plan!

The Pike River Shame List

Two more Inductees for the Imperator Fish Hall of Shame

Ian Wishart

Anyone who has occasion to follow this site will probably know that Ian Wishart and I are unlikely to exchange Christmas cards this year. So it should be no surprise that Wishart is on my Pike River shame list.

Wishart has been using his blog this week to attack the police and rescue teams for their failure to go in to get the miners. He seems to have become a mining expert overnight, has used his blog to accuse police of cowardice, and has offered all sorts of suggestions about what police should have done.

Having attacked the police all week he then says in his latest post:

Much as I might disagree with the initial operational decisions taken by Gary Knowles and Peter Whittal - they were working towards the same goal as everyone else. They should not become a focus of anger.

Well, Ian, perhaps if people like you weren't branding police as cowards there wouldn't be quite so much anger.

Wishart knows no more about mining rescue techniques than I do, or in fact 99.9% of the population. We may learn from a public enquiry that some aspects of the rescue mission weren't handled as well as they should have been. But who are we to judge? That is a judgement only people with expertise in mining rescue can be expected to make. Not journalists or bloggers. God help us if we should ever put a major mining rescue mission in the hands of a journalist. Who knows how many more bodies we might now be searching for?

Objectivist Scum: Mark Hubbard

I've never heard of this guy, but he appears to be one of Lindsay Perigo's followers (so warning bells ought to be going off already).

Mr Hubbard blames the deaths of the 29 miners on the environmental movement.

Well now we know what a green mine does: it kills humans.

So, under DOC’s watch, under the Gaia-worshipping eyes of the bureaucrats, open cast mines will never occur in NZ, and the same wasn’t an option for Pike River. Yet if Pike River had been an open cast mine, all 29 of these miners would still be alive.

Anger should be directed at that fact, which is also the reason why individual liberty is being destroyed, as New Zealand lurches further and further toward Nanny State tyranny: a planned economy built necessarily on the backs of our planned lives, of which this disaster becomes part. And remember the bright side: the trees and snails were all saved.

Exploiting a tragedy like this to push your nutty political views is low behaviour. All but accusing the environmental movement of murdering the 29 men is both offensive and insulting to the families of the victims.

Let's also think for a minute abut the logic of the Objectivist arguments. They regard government regulation as evil. So in the Objectivist utopia we would have little or no health and safety legislation. Mines (closed or open) would be deathtraps, because mine companies would have no incentive to run safe operations. But that's all-right, the Objectivists will say, because the miners would have the choice not to work under those conditions.

Well if that argument is valid then it follows that the 29 who died also made a choice. So how can it be argued that the environmental movement is responsible for their deaths?

I despise Objectivism, because it holds human selfishness up as a virtue. The "I can do what the f**k I want, even if you don't like it" view doesn't work well when we all have to live together, and when the actions of one person can affect numerous other (for example, by destroying the physical environment we all share). Objectivists regard any infringement of their rights to do anything they want as totalitarianism. But they don't know what real totalitarianism is. Perhaps a few of them could go live in North Korea. It might give them some perspective.

No Time

I suppose I shall have to read the latest Welfare Working Group report, eventually. Having read the media reports about it I can only conclude that the main focus of the group is to slash spending on welfare.

But I will have to read the report if I am to usefully critique it. I could just pretend to have read it and launch an attack on the whole bloody thing, but then that would be false and I'd just be another partisan hack attacking something because it exists, rather than because of what it says.

Unfortunately a couple of things will have to occur before I submit my report:

• I will have to become slightly less numbed by the West Coast mining catastrophe
• I will have to explain to a number of important clients that I can't do their critical IP work because I'm on a welfare crusade.

Life would be so much easier if I could just reflexively determine that everything National puts into place is evil.

What To Say?

The Pike River tragedy has left me numb, and there's really not much point in posting anything about it. I can't imagine how awful this must be for the families of the miners.

The only useful remark I can provide is that at first blush the second explosion seems to vindicate the decision by rescue teams not to enter the mine. Had they been attempting a rescue this afternoon they'd have been blown to smithereens.

But all that is for an official enquiry, I suppose.

Just Where Is Honduras?

If there’s one thing I can’t stand it’s bother and fuss. That’s why I’m not enjoying this week. Every time I turn on the telly I see more bother and fuss. Those poor chaps are stuck down that mine, which can’t be a lot of fun, but in my day we made the most of a bad situation. It seems all I hear nowadays is complaint after complaint.

The truth is we don’t know how lucky we are. Let me tell you about bother. Bother is having your testicle shot off by a Chinaman. Did I complain? Not at the time, because they gave me a good dose of morphine. Sixty years later they’re still firing artillery shells at each other in the same god-forsaken place. Too much bother, I tell you. Foreigners never learn.

But as I get older I realise I've seen it all, so I don't let it bother me. When I do get upset about something I just make myself a cup of tea and put the radio on. That Leighton Smith does wonders at calming my nerves, and after an hour or so at that I realise I’ve no reason to feel bad. It’s not my fault the government gave our country away to immigrants and criminals.

Now these miners are obviously in a pickle, and I don’t expect they can get any radio coverage down there. It might do wonders for them, though, if we could maybe hook Leighton up and get him to talk down the mine shaft.

Failing that we ought to be doing something more to rescue these young fellows. Sending in fancy robots sounds far-fetched to me, when we’ve got perfectly adequate people to do the job. What about all those criminals? Send a few of the ratbags down the hole and tell them they can earn a reduction in their sentence if they do a good job. That ought to clear the prisons out, and who knows, maybe one of them will survive to tell us what’s down there.

The authorities seem to shirk from putting people in the way of harm, though. So why don't we put a great big hose down the mine and flood it? Surely all the miners will come bobbling up from the bottom, and there will be no more explosion risk with all that water about.

Another thing I can’t stand is bother on the road. I don’t drive that much anymore, because my eyes are shot, but one thing gets my blood pressure going, and it’s people on bikes. When did cyclists become so angry and aggressive? Those Lycra-clad Charlies think they own the road (they don't, because I do!), so I feel I’m only doing my civic duty when I ram them off the road into the gutter or into parked cars. There’s nothing more pleasing than seeing a distressed cyclist contemplating his twisted wrecked bike.

But cyclists aren't the only problem. There are just too many nutcases on the road, if you ask me. Just yesterday I was driving down the motorway and not one, but dozens of cars were coming at me from the wrong way. The lunatics need to learn to drive on the right side of the road. It was a miracle I wasn’t killed.

There's never anything to watch on the telly since that Parkinson fellow retired. So I bought myself one of those iPads. The chap at Dick Smith said I could load hundreds of books onto it. So I went home, got all my books from the bookcase and stacked them on top of it. Do you know the lousy thing cracked! You can imagine the tone of the conversation I had with the fool at Dick Smith the next day when he refused to give me my money back. Young man, I told him, you'll be hearing from my solicitor.

I couldn't even remember who my solicitor was. So I got the phone book out. That was a struggle, because my eyes are useless and I have to squint to see the fine print. I don't like to see lawyers, accountants and other experts, because they won't give you time of day. All they want to do is be rid of you. They don't want to hear about how I remember the stretch of road their building was on and how in the 1950s it was only one lane each way, whereas now it's mayhem and a fellow can't even walk across the road without being bowled over by some Johnny running a red-light in his fast car, and now you can't even buy a decent pie without the thing just being filled with gravy, and people just aren't polite like they used to be.

So I saw an advertisement in the yellow pages for a fellow who described himself as an intellectual property lawyer and patient attorney. Well that sounded just like my cup of tea, even if I usually have no time for intellectual types and their ivory towers. But I am willing to give a chance to anyone who advertises the fact that they are patient. I must say the meeting I had with him was a bit bewildering, but according to the bill I just received he's filed trade mark applications for me in thirty-seven different countries. Well I guess they may come in handy if I'm ever doing business in Honduras, wherever that is.

This Isn't Hollywood

I have avoided writing anything about the Pike River disaster, because the last thing this event needs is someone giving their opinions on the actions of police and rescuers.

That hasn’t stopped others in various media forums and social media from telling the police how to do their job.

The Herald is now inviting people to tell them whether they are happy with the handling of the disaster.

And others have complained because the style of the police officer in charge of the situation, Tasman Area Police Commander Superintendent Gary Knowles, is a little on the abrasive side.

Perhaps the editors of the Herald have a background in mining search and rescue techniques, though I doubt it. So they really are in no position to judge whether everything that should be done is being done. Nor are the dozens of fools writing in to express their outrage, the vast majority of whom have never been within 500 metres of a mine.

When we want a difficult job done we rely on the experts. They’re experts because they have training, experience and industry knowledge. That doesn’t mean they don’t make mistakes, but if you’re going to challenge the actions of an expert you’d better have a little more than the experience of watching Hollywood blockbusters to guide you.

Sadly, that’s where most of the criticism seems to be headed. Some people seem to think that the rescuers can just walk in there and find the men. Never mind that the combination of lethal gases and potential for further explosions could kill each and every one of the rescuers in an instant. Why should we demand that the rescuers risk their lives in this manner? What about their families? What do we do if the rescuers get stuck down there? Do we send yet more rescuers?

I have no idea whether the authorities are handling the situation appropriately. But then my opinion would be irrelevant in any event, because it would be as uninformed as the views of the buttheads writing to the Herald.

When this is over there should be a thorough official investigation. That investigation should examine whether the rescue mission was conducted properly, and whether anything more could have been done to rescue the men. That will be the time for analysis and judgement, not now.

As for the fact that Superintendent Gary Knowles lacks polish in his press conferences and is abrasive, I just don’t care. Perhaps if he wasn’t fielding so many idiotic questions from the media he might present better. I only care that he’s doing the job properly: the job of getting the 29 miners out.

Threatened S&P Downgrade A Chance To Get The Scalpel Out

The news that Standard and Poor's are threatening a credit rating downgrade for New Zealand will be regarded by the Government as both a problem and an opportunity.

An actual downgrade is clearly bad news, and you don't want to be the ones in power when it happens. But the threat of one may give Bill English impetus to further cut government spending.

S&P will be concerned about our high levels of external debt. As a percentage of GDP it is too high.

Efforts by government to encourage people to save more and borrow less have come to little and lack imagination. A savings taskforce has been put together, but it seems unlikely that our play-it-safe government will allow anything radical to be introduced, such as a compulsory savings regime.

We can expect, then, a focus on reducing government spending. Not that it will make much difference. External debt is the major problem, not public debt. Public debt as a percentage of GDP compares favourably when measured against other countries.

Many people don't understand the difference between public debt (the debt the government has) and external debt (the total debt of the nation). That makes it easy for governments to convince us that by reviewing spending they are doing something. But what we need is fundamental structural reform of our economy to encourage savings and investment, not a scalpel going to more government spending.

Weekend Results Roundup

Prime Minister John Key said on Saturday that he was delighted with the Mana byelection result.

Although Labour’s inexperienced candidate got over 1000 more votes than the National candidate, MP Hekia Parata, Mr Key said it was still a victory to National.

“We never expected to win this,” said Mr Key. “So to pull this off is truly astounding. Hekia ran a wonderful campaign.”

Mr Key compared the result with other recent victories by National.

“This reminds me of our 2005 General Election victory. And last year’s Mt Albert byelection, where we crushed David Shearer.

"And let’s not forget how well the centre-right did in the recent local body elections. This is a historic event.”

Mr Key was referring to the fact that no sitting government has ever won a byelection by taking an opposition-held seat.

History also shows that until now no sitting government has ever made such an effort to disguise the defeat of a local MP by an unknown, by in fact claiming some sort of victory.

******

In Dublin this weekend the Irish rugby team celebrated a rare win against the All Blacks.

Irish coach Declan Kidney claimed victory for Ireland in Saturday’s test, after pointing out that the previous test the two teams played in 2010 resulted in a 38 point margin to New Zealand.

The margin on Saturday was only 30 points.

The victory over New Zealand was one of many moral victories inflicted against the New Zealand team by the Irish lately.

In 2008 The All Blacks had a moral loss to the Irish in Wellington, winning 21-11. And later that year the Irish stunned them by losing 22-3.

It is not yet known whether the International Rugby Board will endorse Ireland’s moral victories.

******

Meanwhile, last night, the English netball team were also in celebratory mood, after winning a close game against New Zealand in the fastnet netball competition in Liverpool this morning.

Beaten 28-26 on the scoreboard, the international-stacked England team were thrilled to morally defeat a junior New Zealand team.

“We pushed them all the way,” said an elated English captain Karen Atkinson. “The scoreboard doesn’t reflect the effort we put in. This is one of the best moral victories of my career.”

Basic Economics Eludes Herald Opinionator

Let us hope that Herald columnist and assistant editor John Roughan doesn't become a business or economics columnist.

Here's how he began today's column:

A man who came to clean the carpet posed an awkward question.

He said, "There is one thing I never understand. All the time there are lots of businesses being started. Many of them get into difficulties and they don't expect the Government to help them out.

"But when something like this kiwifruit disease strikes a farming business, it's different. Why is that?"

It was an honest question, asked without a political undertone, and I couldn't offer an answer.

I ran the obvious one through my mind: farmers produce exports. But he knew that. He was asking why wealth created by selling a kiwifruit abroad is more important than wealth created by cleaning my carpet.

A dollar is a dollar, a job is a job. It really doesn't matter where it happens.

Well it does. A dollar earned by the carpet cleaner is a dollar lost by his customer. Wealth is being created for one, while for another wealth is being reduced. 

But wealth created by exporters isn't generally at the expense of other New Zealanders. Exporting brings money into New Zealand. The carpet-cleaner's job is merely circulating existing money and is unlikely to create significant growth for the economy.

Our balance of payments may not be flash, but it is the strength of our nation's exports that gives us the opportunity to acquire foreign goods and services. For the carpet-cleaner, this probably includes the machines he uses.

This isn't voodoo economics. It seems pretty bloody obvious, in fact. So why doesn't John Roughan get it?

(The rest of his column is batty too. He says we are exceptionally well governed thanks to deregulation and that selective taxation was the ruination of Ireland. Well, it was probably a bit more complex than that in the case of Ireland, and dare we mention those film industry tax credits? Oh, and apparently kiwifruit growers should be insuring for their risk of loss of stock. Hmm...)

Blaming The Victim So Soon After Her Death Is Tasteless And Wrong

It's been a while, but today sees another entry in the Imperator Fish Hall of Shame 

It takes a lot to make me genuinely angry when I'm reading the newspapers or the news websites.

But motoring journalist Dave Moore has managed it with this blog on Stuff.

He begins:

The cycling death close to Kelly Tarlton's in Auckland this week has a few "if onlys" about it.

• If only the motorist had looked before opening his door into the path of the approaching cyclist.
• If only the truck driver had been able to keep out of the way.
• If only the cyclist had been using the marked cycle lane provided on the footpath, instead of the highway.

Well I can't argue with any of that. Another "if only" would have been if the cyclist had just stayed home that day.

However, expecting a cyclist to use the cycleway along the footpath is a bit daft. It's really only suitable if you are cycling with kids, because you're sharing the footpath with joggers, rollerbladers, and mums with baby buggies. You can't go very fast at all.

Moore writes:

If any irony can be seen in this not uncommon occurrence, where a cyclist has tried to avoid an opening car door, it's that if a motorist had run into the same door or swerved into the path of other traffic trying to avoid it, then they would probably have been charged with careless use of a motor vehicle.

On what grounds? A person who opens a door into oncoming traffic is probably committing an offence under the Land Transport (Road User) Rule 2004. Rule 7.2(1) says:

A person must not cause a hazard to any person by opening or closing a door of a motor vehicle, or by leaving the door of a motor vehicle open.

I wonder if Moore has any evidence that police routinely charge drivers of vehicles that take evasive action to avoid car doors, or whether in fact he's just making stuff up.

Moore then writes:

If he or she had a good lawyer, then a fraught argument in court might find fault with the door-opener, which is what always happens when a cyclist is on the recieving end.

That's what should almost always happen when a cyclist is on the receiving end as a result of a car door. It's all too easy to not think about what you're doing when you open a car door, but you have to take the consequences if you fail to pay attention.

Moore continues:

Motorists are being reminded constantly by roadside signage and advertising to give cyclists at least a metre. Perhaps if cyclists were also encouraged to keep a metre away from cars, this week's tragedy might not have happened.

Sometimes the nature of the road makes it difficult for cyclists to keep a metre away from cars. If there's no room on the road because moving traffic isn't giving you the space then you can either pull out into the middle of the lane (and hope that some angry or careless motorist doesn't knock you down), or go closer to the car door than you would like and take the chance that someone opens it. Short of stopping behind the parked car and waiting for clear traffic, what exactly is the low-risk option here? Does it sound sensible that bikers should have to do this every time there is a parked car?

Moore obviously had a bee in his bonnet about cyclists. His attitude is echoed by many others on his blog, who seem to think that because some cyclists are idiots they all deserve what they get. Well there are plenty of idiotic drivers too, and I suspect a good many of them harbour an aggressive intolerance towards anyone who slows them down, including cyclists. If drivers were more patient of and tolerant towards cyclists then cyclists would probably feel safer keeping a metre away from parked cars

What turned Moore's post from a badly-researched anti-cyclist rant into something far more loathsome was its finish:

But I'll bet that the car door opener in this case will be prosecuted, and maybe even the truck driver, while we'll simply feel sorry for a cyclist who, as usual, will be deemed blameless.

The cyclist is dead. Yes we will feel sorry for her. We ought to, shouldn't we? And why exactly shouldn't the car door opener be prosecuted? How hard is it to take a look in your car's mirror?

To write such a thing so soon after the poor woman's death is truly distasteful. This sort of villainy deserves its own form of recognition, hence the induction of Dave Moore into the Imperator Fish Hall of Shame.

Dedicated To The Children Of Christchurch

The wheels on the bus are bald and bare
bald and bare, bald and bare,
The wheels on the bus are bald and bare
all through the town.

The wipers on the bus don't go at all
go at all, go at all,
The wipers on the bus don't go at all
all through the town.

The doors on the bus go open and jam
open and jam, open and jam,
The doors on the bus go open and jam
all through the town.

The lights on the bus are on the blink
on the blink, on the blink,
The lights on the bus are on the blink
all through the town.

The people on the bus fear for their lives
for their lives, for their lives,
The people on the bus fear for their lives
all through the town.

The driver on the bus says "I've bloody had enough!
"bloody had enough, bloody had enough!"
The driver on the bus says "I've bloody had enough!"
all through the town.

The policeman on the bus says "that's not safe"
"that's not safe, that's not safe",
The policeman on the bus says "that's not safe"
all through the town. 

The people at the bus-stop wait and wait
wait and wait, wait and wait,
The people at the bus-stop wait and wait
because their stupid f**king bus is grounded.

A Thursday Miscellany

So I was sick or travelling for the better part of the last week, so it has taken a while for me to catch up with all the news. I've been a bit quiet on the blog front, but now I'm on catch-up.

It even took me a while  to catch up with the devastating international news story. Now I know that James Blunt has released another album the world just seems a worse place to live in.

Thankfully I have learned that there will always be a kind and cuddly right winger to help me in my time of need. In possibly her most ludicrous column yet written, Deborah Hill Cone tried to convince readers last Friday that right-wingers were only being mean to the poor because they cared. Cruel to be kind, you know. Get off your arse, you lazy poor sick mentally-ill person with drug and abuse issues and get yourself a proper job. It'll do you some good! She might have been more convincing had she not also spoken with some admiration towards the terminally barking mad Lindsay Perigo, who was speaking at the launch of his new TV show (God knows on what TV channel - probably one of those that at any time has no more than ten viewers). If that man has an ounce of compassion towards disadvantaged people he certainly hides it well.

Perigo's speech can be found at his own personal site (I won't link to it, sorry: use Google), a site filled with gushing praise by many for his heroic efforts in fighting off the barbarians and socialists who have tried to take over news and current affairs. Don Brash says of Perigo:

He is very highly regarded for his professionalism, for his integrity, and for his intelligence, and his reputation as a journalist is quite exceptional

This is the guy we entrusted to find the answer to closing the income gap with Australia. Does Dr Brash also agree with Perigo that President Obama should be assassinated if he isn't voted out?

Brash is very active nowadays, although most of what comes from his mouth or word processor reveals a lack of imagination and an inability to adapt to changing times. In a Herald column earlier this week he attacked an entirely sensible proposition from Fran O'Sullivan that the Government should invest in potentially high-growth sectors, calling the idea "nuts". This is similar to what Singapore does. And, yes, Brash admires the Singaporeans (I can almost hear him saying "my ex-wife is from Singapore, you know"), but only because they have no welfare state and no minimum wage.

Brash may not be so happy at present to learn that the company he was executive chairman of until a month or so ago, Huljich Wealth Management, is now facing criminal charges under the Securities Act for misleading prospective investors. I will let the courts be the judge of whether Brash and his company colleagues have sinned, but if the disclosure information pedalled to Huljich investors was anything like the snake-oil delivered up in the two 2025 Taskforce reports to date, Brash may be in some bother.

The big political story of the last week has concerned travel expenses, thanks to some either inept or corrupt (I'm not going to make a call on which it was) behaviour by National MP Pansy Wong. I had a crack at Pete Hodgson last week for his laughable suggestion that writing "minister" when witnessing a business document amounted to acting in a ministerial capacity. Thankfully for Hodgson (most of whose bombs have tended to blow up in his face in the past), there was more substantial wrongdoing to reveal. I'm not sure whether I owe Hodgson an apology, because maybe the witnessing question was just a warm-up to see how Wong would react. He certainly won the battle, and Wong's career is in ruins. I would be surprised if she does not resign from Parliament, because Key's management approach seems to be to cut away anything that drags down the team, rather than endure the ongoing trauma of bad publicity. Botany's a safe National seat, but a by-election just gives the Opposition more opportunities to be heard.

And the best thing about Thursdays is Grumpy Garth. Today he is in full curmudgeon mode, railing against scientists and researchers. 

Day after day in this newspaper and others we are presented with stories in which the first sentence ends with the words "a new survey shows" or "new research reveals" or "scientists have discovered".

These items seem to have an irresistible appeal to news editors seeking urgently to fill inconvenient holes in news pages.

Few of these "research" results add anything to the sum of human knowledge for often all they do is confirm "scientifically" what we sentient humans have known either intuitively or by experience ever since we put childhood behind us.

Finding a few examples of apparently pointless research, and then denouncing the entire scientific establishment for wasting taxpayers' money telling us what we already know, is pretty much a staple for right-wing columnists of the mostly-male always-curmudgeonly type. I suspect it is the first thing they leap to when writer's block kicks in and the newspaper deadline is drawing close.

He even gets to quote his favourite book when musing over a survey about cheating Italian men:

That only goes to show that the Bible has it right - one man for one woman for life, and "you shall not commit adultery" - and that God didn't proclaim such principles to spoil our fun but rather to enhance it.

I also like to quote the Bible. This bit says it's okay to own slaves:

Your male and female slaves are to come from the nations around you; from them you may buy slaves. You may also buy some of the temporary residents living among you and members of their clans born in your country, and they will become your property. (Leviticus 25:44-45)

But this one might cause even Family First's supporters to blush:

For everyone who curses his father or his mother shall surely be put to death. He has cursed his father or his mother. His blood shall be upon him. (Leviticus 20:9)

Thanks Garth. That Bible book sure has some neat learnings in it. Much more authoritative than all that  scientific stuff, eh?

No I Don't Like This

Sir Cecil Worthington-Brown gives his opinion on the royal engagement

No, indeed I can't say I approve of this impending royal marriage.

Just what is the lad thinking? Marrying a commoner? It should have been obvious to anyone who knows royal history that things would go wrong as soon as the silly boy got himself some book learning. And why go to Scotland to do it? That's where he met that dreadfully middle class girl.

I've been to Scotland many a time, and I enjoy a fine malt whisky, but our Edward had the buggers thrashed well and good back in the day, and they've never let us forget it. Scotland's no place to send a royal unless it's behind the wheel of a tank.

Even if he had to study in that terrible place, surely he could have found a castle to live in and not been forced to slum it with a bunch of unwashed students with potentially radical views on such issues as the rights of women and minorities. Isn't Scotland full of castles?

I suppose this all arose because William wanted to be "normal" and earn the respect of his peers. So someone ought to tell William that the only peers who matter are the ones who sit in the House of Lords. And of course I don't mean the appointed ones. Imposters! He would be better off just accepting the fact that the British Royal Family are not normal. No, they are far, far better than the rest of us.

I don't say this simply because I happen to be of royal blood (seventy-eighth in line to the throne), or out of a conceit built up from a lifetime of privilege and luxury at the expense of the working classes. It is jolly fun being richer than almost everyone else, though. No, I speak from the evidence. Just look some of the magnificent rulers we've had over the centuries: the two Elizabeths, Henry XIII, Edward II, George III. I could go on.

At least this awful commoner isn't Scottish too. But couldn't someone else have been found? Even a German would have been better, so long as she was pure of blood and had impeccable heritage. I'm rather fond of the Germans, in fact. I remember as a young lad in the 1930s when that nice fellow Ribbentrop came to visit our estate. He seemed like a no-nonsense sort of man who had the Bolsheviks pegged for the rotters they turned out to be. His leader, that rather excitable chap with the funny moustache, certainly wasn't the sort I'd have sat down with over a rubber of bridge, but he did have some interesting political ideas that he never got to fully implement, all because of that beastly misunderstanding over Poland.

The Germans have themselves produced a few fine royals. Kaiser Wilhelm II was Victoria's grandson, and the Windsors are themselves a branch of the German House of Saxe-Coburg and Gotha. Indeed it was only after some further misunderstandings with the Germans in 1917 that they became known as the House of Windsor.

There's another reason why William should be looking further afield for his marriage partner. Historically the French have always been devious and untrustworthy, and they remain to this day a threat to our sovereignty. A royal alliance with a solid German aristocratic family would have helped to shore up our position in central Europe and would have ensure that if the French caused us any kind of trouble they could expect to get it back from two sides. That might make the sly fellows think twice. Those Frogs have always feared Prussian power.

So all in all I don't approve of this marriage. I blame the boy's mother. The People's Princess they called her. William obviously got this madness from her. Even though the Frogs finished her off too. You think he'd learn.

Someone ought to have a word with William and tell him his duty lies in marrying a good plump German girl with impeccable aristocratic connections. All the better to enable us to build a strong Anglo-Germanic power across Europe and spread terror to those goddamn Frogs!

Final ACTA Treaty Released

The final draft of ACTA (subject to final legal review*) has been released, and it appears much watered down from previous versions.

You can view it here. It's not a hard read - only 24 pages.

No doubt many of those totally opposed to ACTA will still rail against it. That can hardly be a surprise, given the veil of secrecy covering many of the negotiations. The entire process to get to this point has been difficult and filled with controversy.

I haven't followed the minutiae of the ACTA negotiations and the various changes to the treaty language along the way, but from a quick read of the final draft it doesn't look like our government will need to implement huge changes to our IP or customs laws to comply with the treaty. I'm not sure whether our current copyright provisions regarding technological protection measures are consistent with the treaty, but the treaty is filled with exceptions and I've only taken the briefest look. Someone with more of an interest in the issue than me will no doubt examine to what extent our laws are consistent with the treaty.

Some rightsholders may be concerned that some of the key provisions they pushed for have been watered down.

And there will be those who just want to put the damn thing in a shredder or burn it, regardless of what it says. The term "ACTA" inspires a lot of venom in some people.

* I'm not sure if this legal review will be a "one last final check in case we missed anything obvious" review or more of a detailed legal review. I assume the former, otherwise they wouldn't be calling it a final draft. The lawyers will/should have been heavily engaged in the drafting from the beginning.

A Question

What is filled with green slime, sleeps for no more than 20 minutes at a time, and spends entire days groaning?

Yes, it's me. Sorry to bother you with my medical woes, but I thought some of you might have been wondering why no blog posts since Saturday.

Although I still feel crap, I feel slightly less crap that I did yesterday. If I actually get some sleep tonight I might post something tomorrow.

Too Free?

New Zealand has been ranked the third most open and free economy at this year's APEC meeting.

That must be something of an embarrassment for those right-wingers who claim we are a nation tied up in red tape and regulation that cripples our economic performance.

We made a decision many years ago that it was in the national interest to remove almost all barriers on trade. When we discovered that most of our trading partners were more than happy to insist upon free trade, except when it required them to allow our agricultural goods in without barriers, we were outraged. But what did we expect?

Demanding other countries play fair only works when the party making the demand has something to negotiate. However, we are a small economy and we already let in just about everything other countries want to send us. Nobody will have been listening to John Key's lectures on free trade at APEC.

It's too late now to turn our backs on free trade, because most of our formerly protected industries have disappeared. We have also signed international trade agreements with other nations that would make it almost impossible to increase barriers without serious repercussions for our exports.

Free trade can be a good thing, but only when it is reciprocated. Being the third-most-free economy in APEC isn't much to celebrate.

We Came So Close To Losing Phil Collins

According to Stuff:

Phil Collins has contemplated killing himself, and would always pick an option that "didn't hurt".

I so identify with this story. I too have contemplated killing Phil Collins. Okay, only in my imagination. My imagination can be quite vivid, however, and, Phil, I'm afraid you suffered greatly during your death, which was slow and extremely messy.

The star admits his latest marriage breakdown and criticism of his solo material left him so depressed he considered ending his life, but the thought of his children stopped him.

Where were those thoughts when he was making No Jacket Required? Why wasn't he thinking of the children of the world before he unleashed Billy Don't Lose That Number upon us?

The star lives in Switzerland, and one of his main pastimes is collecting things linked to the Battle of the Alamo, which was part of the Texas revolution in 1836. He is so interested in the event he wonders if he was involved with it in a past life, and he also regularly sees orbs.

It's called the moon, Phil.

"It's paranormal energy," he told the publication. "I don't want to sound like a weirdo. I'm not Shirley MacLaine, but I'm prepared to believe. You've seen the pictures. You can't deny them, so therefore it's possible that I was there in another life."

Of course the Buddhists believe in rebirth. One wonders, however, what kind of creature he must have been to be reincarnated as Phil Collins. He must have hurt a lot of people.

But that's probably enough sneering from me. I don't exactly come to this thing with clean hands. For I have my own secret to share, a dirty secret I've been hiding away for many years. You see, the first piece of music I ever purchased on my own was a cassette tape of No Jacket Required. Oh the shame! But I was so young, and those toe-tapping tunes led me astray.

 Was this album the finest moment in 1980s rock? (No it wasn't)

And I still think this is a good song. It has a killer drum track (he's always been a good drummer, even if listening to Another Day in Paradise makes me want to go out and attack homeless people).




It's just a pity he kept making solo albums after this.

(I also have a number of Genesis albums, which is another source of deep shame within my family. I will understand if you never visit this site again. I will, really.)

Biosecurity Fears As Hodgson's Disease Breaks Out

Biosecurity officials have been scrambling this week to contain yet another outbreak of Hodgson’s Disease among pigs in the Wellington region.

But a prominent animal health expert has said that the disease cannot be contained, and has accused MAF officials of exaggerating their past successes in eradicating harmful organisms.

The disease has the potential to devastate the New Zealand pork industry.

It is not yet known how widespread the disease is, or how long it has been present in the region. But there have been several isolated outbreaks of the disease in the Wellington area in the last two years.

While Hodgson’s Disease is rarely fatal in pigs, it can be painful and debilitating.

In most pigs the body creates antibodies to fight off foreign substances, such as infections and viruses. However, when a pig has Hodgson’s Disease the antibodies cease to recognise the difference between harmful foreign substances and the body’s own tissue and healthy cells. As a result supposedly friendly antibodies become destructive of all that they are designed to preserve.

Professor Ferdinand Shultz of Massey University, an expert in autoimmune diseases in animals, has studied Hodgson’s Disease for over twenty years.

He said the disease has the potential to wipe out New Zealand’s pork industry.

“Hodgson’s Disease is slow and debilitating,” said Professor Shultz. “It usually leads to the inflammation of joints, resulting in the animal being unable to stand properly or to move forward. In rare cases it is fatal.

“The disease usually spreads when animals are confined together in large numbers inside a building. That’s why in some countries they still call it by its traditional name, Blight on the House.”

MAF officials have said they are hopeful of confining the disease to the Wellington region, and of ultimately eradicating it.

Richard Lemburg, Assistant Director-General of Biosecurity at MAF, said that the recent effort to eradicate Cerebral Pansy had been a stunning success, and was an example of how effective good quarantining and risk management procedures could be.

Mr Lemburg also cited the recent success in isolating and destroying a sheep found to be suffering from Carter’s Syndrome.

“In that case a farmer reported to us that one of the sheep in his flock was behaving in an uncharacteristically aggressive but confused manner. We quickly established that the animal was suffering from Carter’s Syndrome, isolated it and destroyed it.

“We tested seventeen of the animals, but only the one was infected.”

But Professor Shultz said he was sceptical about some of the achievements being claimed by MAF officials.

“There have been no reports of Cerebral Pansy occurring anywhere in Wellington for years,” said Professor Shultz. “I don’t see how they can claim a success in eradicating something that was never present.

“Most likely they misdiagnosed another condition, known as ATS, or Acute Troughing Syndrome.”

ATS is a condition that affects approximately one in ten pigs.

When ATS occurs in pigs they develop a voracious appetite, and typically spend a lot of time at the food trough. Their Hides also change colour from a fleshy pink to a deep brown, and begin to shed hair.

“From the test results I’ve seen I’m confident that MAF was dealing with ATS, and not Cerebral Pansy,” said Professor Shultz.

Professor Shultz also said that MAF’s efforts to contain the latest outbreak were likely to be futile.

“Hodgson’s Disease is highly contagious and virulent, and despite our best efforts it keeps rearing its ugly head,” said Professor Shultz.

“It’s not dissimilar to Mallardenoma, and we lost the battle to contain that disease many years ago.”

Bring Back The Dim Post

So I go away on business overnight and the blogosphere caves in.

Anyway, I’ve reached the point where it’s all too banal even to laugh at so I’m taking a break from blogging for an indeterminate period.

NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!

This is all Pete Hodgson's fault. Damn your eyes, sir!

Coleman Isn't The Only One

It has been reported that Minister of Immigration and Broadcasting Jonathan Coleman last night gave a speech in Parliament yesterday on behalf of the absent Revenue Minister Peter Dunne.

Coleman gave the speech during a debate on the Taxation (International Investment and Remedial Matters) Bill.

Unfortunately for Coleman he gave the wrong speech. The speech he gave was originally delivered by Dunne in 2008.

To be fair to Coleman, taxation is clearly not his area of expertise. But if you are going to stand up in the House and talk about something you should at least have a passing understanding of it.

Shockingly, this is not the first time a politician has been caught out discussing something he has no idea about.

Investigations have revealed that since National took office in 2008, Finance Minister Bill English has made a number of speeches to the House about issues he knows nothing about: such as raising productivity, developing a sustainable economy for our nation's future, and economic management.

Another Hodgson Cheap Shot?

In Parliament today Labour MP Pete Hodgson accused Minister Pansy Wong of misusing her ministerial position.

Hodgson accused Wong of breaking Cabinet rules. He alleged Wong wrote "Minister of NZ govt" when she witnessed a document in a transaction involving her husband.

Seriously?

If all Wong did was put her occupation down as a witness to a document, then how can that be a breach of the rules? She wasn't a party to the document. Being a witness to a document is nothing.

I don't claim to know what the Cabinet rules are, but surely signing a document as a witness is not forbidden. I'm happy to be corrected, however.

If putting "Minister" down as her occupation when she witnessed the document was a breach of the rules, then the rules need to change. What was she supposed to put?

I suspect, though, that the rules don't forbid what Wong did. I think it's much more likely that this is a smear by an MP with form for launching nasty personal attacks on people.

I don't like the "game" of politics.  Attacking Wong for doing something you know is perfectly acceptable, knowing that some people will think she did wrong, is low behaviour. 

Important Lessons

#1 On Firewalls

Just because I can view all the details of a particularly awful case on the Stuff website at work, doesn't mean that when I copy and paste that detail onto my site for a blog article the work firewall won't block my site.

I have deleted the post in question, because there's no fun in being an attention-seeking blogger when your followers can't access your site.

It wasn't a very good post anyway. It is probably cached somewhere (just in case you think I'm trying to delete something I shouldn't have written).

A Happier, Smilier SAS

Gentlemen,

I am truly humbled to stand before you today. You have always been, and remain, the very elite of New Zealand's armed forces. It is a privilege as Defence Minister to be in your presence.

The New Zealand SAS has a long and distinguished history, and SAS men have performed exceptionally in every field of combat they have been posted to.

Nevertheless, no organisation can rest on its reputation and past achievements alone. The world is a changing place, and institutions must adapt to those changes or risk becoming obsolete. In that respect the New Zealand SAS has always led from the front in its training and tactics.

But in 2008 the world changed in another way. It will not have escaped your attention that we live in difficult economic times. The government is being forced to run large deficits, and we will soon be forced to make some tough decisions if we are to protect the economic viability of this nation. We need to find new sources of revenue if we are to continue funding our defence forces at current levels.

The Defence White Paper has identified that our military needs to be able to adapt to changing strategic environments. Flexibility and adaptability will be critical to our defence forces in the future. Gentlemen, I am giving you the opportunity to lead from the front, as you always have, and to embrace change eagerly. You have always been role models and an inspiration to our younger men, so I ask you to take this opportunity to enhance your standing and prestige within a new group: middle-aged corporate executives whose best days are behind them.

I want to talk to you today about your next mission. I've called it Operation Big Cheque. From next week we will be changing your rotations so that, when you are on-base, you will be working with us on revenue-gathering activities at least 50% of the time.

From recent activities involving large groups of big swinging dick executives, it's clear that corporates will pay big dollars to get to handle our toys, to shake the hands of real SAS men, and to brag to their colleagues about the SAS training they underwent. It may be tough financially for many businesses, but there's money to burn in the corporate world for this kind of thing. It's an opportunity we mustn't let slip.

I won't pretend the new emphasis on corporate entertainment will be plain sailing. It will require hard work, training, and, for some, an attitude shift. For example, I'm aware that your force has a reputation of recruiting emotionally hard men who perhaps lack social graces. This will have to change. If we're going to take cash off CEOs and company directors we have to do it with a smile. For some of you that may mean customer service training. Others many even need counselling or intense psychiatric interventions. What we must always remember is that the customer is always right. Let that be our motto.

Talking of the motto, that's another thing we need to refresh. "Who Dares Wins" may appeal to the corporates on a certain level, but it won't really reflect the new 21st Century SAS. That's why from 1 January next year the new motto will be "He Who Pays Gets To Play".

We would also be foolish to ignore the power of the SAS brand. That's why we have been in negotiations with a number of parties for naming rights. I'm pleased to announce that you will soon be known as the Vodafone Special Air Service.

There are some remarkable individuals in this group, none more so than Corporal Willie Apiata. Corporal, let me just say how much I have admired your courage and bravery. You are an asset to this organisation. Like all good business assets you need to be at front of shop, where the public can see you. We've hired you a publicist, and Brian Edwards has been engaged to give you media training. Before we unleash you onto the celebrity circuit we're going to give you a whole new wardrobe and makeover. We want to see you as a regular feature on the pages of the gossip mags and women's magazines. We've also developing a "fly on the wall" reality TV show concept for you to star in. I'm afraid this will mean no more killing, because we think the viewing public won't be keen on a TV star who spends his days shooting insurgents.

The most important thing is to ensure your corporate guests relax when they're in your company. You might be a group of highly-strung emotionally damaged ruthless killers, but don't let them see that side of you. When you are with these people you need to be able to talk in their language.

To help you with this we have compiled a new set of phrases to use. You will be required to memorise these, and to use them when you are with your guests. But I would urge you to make this the new lexicon of the SAS, and to make these words your own. Let's go through some of the key phrases you will need to learn.

• The chain of command will now be known as the "responsibility curve". Officers will be known as "stakeholders".
• Taking prisoners will now be known as "taking ownership".
• "Horizontal marketing" will be the term you use to describe the inflicting of casualties.
• Killing large numbers of the enemy will be "disincentivising".
• "Leveraging core competencies" will be taking the right people on a critical mission.
• "Getting all your ducks in a row" will be the technical term you use to describe ambushing an enemy column along a narrow mountain track.
• A "level playing field" will describe an area of the battlefield with no ground cover.
• "Moving the goalposts" will describe the situation where an attack goes badly wrong, requiring a sudden change in tactics.
• An "aggressive marketing strategy" will describe a firefight with the enemy.
• "Key performance indicators" will be used to describe the numbers of enemy killed.
• "Change management" will be dealing with a surprise attack.
• "Exploiting synergies" will be the term used for giving your comrades supporting fire.
• "Blue sky thinking" will be planning a parachute drop into enemy territory.
• "Low hanging fruit" will be the name for an enemy force caught on a level playing field.

Like all organisational changes, I expect this one to take time. But change is critical. If we can put on a smile, laugh and be at ease with our guests, they will be more likely to part with their cash.

Finally, let me finish with a song. To me this says everything about the new SAS business model. I want you to take this to heart.

Gray skies are gonna clear up,
Put on a happy face;
rush off the clouds and cheer up,
Put on a happy face.

Take off the gloomy mask of tragedy,
It's not your style;
You'll look so good that you'll be glad
Ya' decide to smile!

Did You Burn Any Catholics Last Night?

After another Guy Fawkes night that kept firefighters and emergency services desperately busy, the Prime Minister has suggested it may be time to look again at the regulation of firework sales.

"It's getting completely out of hand," said Mr Key.

"We have to ask ourselves why we put our emergency services through this every year.

"We've gotten completely away from the true meaning of the celebration. I've been told that very few effigies of the Pope were burnt last night, nor were bonfires lit to celebrate our nation's escape from the tyranny of Catholicism.

"Maybe it's time we thought again about the entire thing. That's why we intend to look again at the issue of banning fireworks."

The proposal was immediately criticised by opposition parties.

Labour leader Phil Goff agreed that something needed to be done about Guy Fawkes night. But he said Labour would not support a ban on the sale of fireworks.

"It's true that we have moved away from the true meaning of Guy Fawkes night," said Mr Goff.

"But the date is an important one in our calendar. The monstrosity that is Popishness must never be forgotten."

Mr Goff promised that a Labour government would make the burning of effigies of Catholics compulsory.

"Let's not be under any illusions about the scourge that is Catholicism. Mr Key may not see it, but Labour does.

"We take the safety of communities seriously. That's why a Labour government will bring back public bonfire nights, to enable communities to come together to root out the Catholics in their midst and publicly burn them.

"We also want to amend a number of statutes to ensure Papists can no longer threaten our nation's Protestant values. We're looking at a number of options, including amending the Sentencing Act, so that when judges are passing criminal sentences the fact that the victim was a Catholic is a mitigating factor."

Mr Goff denied that Labour was engaging in religious intolerance and hatred against a minority group.

"Look, that's complete nonsense. No party has done more than Labour to empower minorities and give people of different creeds and religions a voice.

"It just happens that the voice we heard loud and clear was 'let's burn all Papists.'

"So to suggest that we're vilifying a minority is ridiculous. We're giving minority groups what they want."

Mate!

Well fuck me, I had a day yesterday. There was me looking forward to a big weekend watching the boys smashing the Aussies in the league when the phone goes and, would you know it, it’s me old mate John Key.

“John,” I says, “Mate!”

“Peter,” he says. “I need a favour”. He tells me he wants to impress some lady friend of his down in Wellington, and he needs my help. This sheila’s supposed to turn up at his place and he has to cook for her.

“No worries, mate,” I tell him. “Put the barbie on and serve her a few bangers. The ladies can‘t resist a good sausage watered down with a bit of the brown nectar.”

Mate, I’m a Lion Red man myself, but the posher ladies like something a bit more sophisticated. So I also tell him, “mate, get her a few crates of that fancy stuff they put in green bottles. Steinlagers and the like.”

He says to me, John says, “there’s a lot of people going to be there. Can you help with the catering? Bill says we can’t afford to splash out too much on the fancy wine and food. And I want to give her an authentic Kiwi experience.”

"Mate, there's no-one more authentically Kiwi than me", I tell him. "If I was any more Kiwi I'd be eating worms and have a feather up me arse.

“Look, mate,” I tell him. “If this lady friend of yours means that much I’ll be there. Tell you what I’ll do. I’ll throw in ten kilos of my finest pork bangers, all for just $5.99 a kilo. Yes, that‘s right, only $5.99 a kilo!”

“We’ll need more than sausages,” he says. “What else have you got?"

“Mate, just the best damn meat patties you will find! Slap ‘em on the griller and throw ‘em between a couple of bits of bread. A two-kilo bag will set you back $12.99. Maaaate!”

He then tells me there’s one of those fancy limos coming to pick me up for the airport, and that he wants me to man the barbie. Before you know it I’m at this posh establishment in Wellington standing in front of this fucking great piece of shiny metal.

“Mate!” I tell one of John’s boys. “What the fuck is this?”

“It’s a barbeque,” the bastard says.

“You’re bullshitting me,” I tell him. “I can’t bloody cook on this thing. Come on mate, let’s grab a ute and head to the BBQ Factory.”

We buy a three-burner for less than three hundy, and pretty soon it’s humming away with a couple dozen bangers and patties sizzling on top.

Then the fancy lady turns up, and a shitload of other people too. Fuck me, I tell you there were more suits than a dodgy deck of cards! It was a real swanky event. They even had wine from bottles.

The lady’s a Yank, but not even a foreigner can resist one of my sausages. “Here," I tell her, walking up to her with a pork sausage in bread, drowned in Mr Wattie’s finest. “Get your laughing gear around that.”

That's when the whole evening went tits-up for me. Some bloke in a suit pushes me away, so I give his jaw a bit of a tickle with me fist. Hey, I’m an old bugger, but I can still do the business, and they never expect it.

Then one of his mates shows up and has a go. Before you know it I’m beating the shit out of a whole heap of suits, all while this high-class lady looks on.

You’d think she'd be grateful for me keeping those lowlife scumbags from her, but then she tells me to get away from her. Well what a stuck-up sour-faced old cow. I let her know what I think.

Then the cops grab me and I spend the night in the slammer. Mate! All because I tried to help an old mate with a chick.

Mate, I don’t need that kind of shit. The papers now say I’ve caused a diplomatic incident, and all because I tried to help out. The papers are always having a go at the league boys for getting into trouble but, mate, they’re good boys compared to that fucking feral lot in suits.

Mate!

Well I Tried

Okay, okay, so I tried to read the entire bloody thing, but after a few pages of the latest 2025 Taskforce Report I began to feel my will to live slipping away.

So I skimmed it. It’s just a rehash of the last report, albeit with some new graphs and different citations. But the message is the same. Read the ACT Party policy summary if you want the short version.

However, a few things stood out as I read the report, and I've set them out below.

There are a number of blatant untruths or distortions in the document, which is why the entire thing should be seen as a piece of political propaganda. For example, the report claims:

The sharp increase in New Zealand government spending since 2004 has created our largest structural primary budget deficit in decades.

Except that this is not true. The large deficits being run by the current government are a direct result of the sharp drop in economic activity arising from the global recession, and the consequent fall in the tax take. Labour was running budget surpluses well past 2004.

The report conflates our overseas indebtedness as a nation with rates of government indebtedness. One figure is extremely high, while the other is not. Brash tries to argue that the high level of indebtedness means we have to slash government spending. He also argues we need to do away with Kiwisaver contributions. Does anyone else see the contradiction here? One of our fundamental problems is a lack of national savings. Schemes like Kiwisaver are likely to be the very things that get us out of the debt hole.

The case for asset sales is weakly put. The report claims that New Zealand’s lack of public asset sales since 1999 has put us out of line with practice in other advanced and emerging countries. But a lot of the countries we are compared with began from a position of having a huge number of assets. We flogged off most of ours in the 1980s and 1990s. How can we be expected to maintain equivalent rates of divestment when there’s bugger-all left?

The report demands welfare cuts, because this will supposedly incentivise people back into the workforce. What evidence is there of this? Where are the jobs?

On R&D the report says:

Much international evidence from empirical studies indicates that only private R and D spending has a direct impact on growth, because it is initiated by firms in response to their own perceptions of profit opportunities. This means that government funding of R and D should not be increased.

So why then do countries that invest more in public R&D outperform our own?

The authors really lose the plot when they say:

The research and tertiary education sector is too heavily micro-managed towards “official visions” of New Zealand’s economic development path. Public research funding should once again be fully contestable, and roadblocks to improved governance and consolidation of entities in the research and tertiary education sector should be removed.

No, no, no! Fully contestable funding has been a disaster for the CRI sector, as the CRI Taskforce Report has established. We are moving deliberately away from this utterly failed system. Did Don Brash even read the CRI Taskforce report?

On regulation:

Despite the far-reaching reforms in the 1980s and 1990s, New Zealand once again has too much low-quality regulation, creating barriers to economic growth in a number of key markets and sectors.

This is manifestly and demonstrably false. New Zealand is regularly cited as one of the easiest places in the world to do business. If regulation isa major barrier to productivity and economic performance, then we should be an economic powerhouse.

On the minimum wage:

Abolition of the youth minimum wage has had a seriously adverse impact on youth unemployment, and it should be reinstated urgently.

Where’s the evidence? The authors point to a graph that shows that youth unemployment is at record levels. Well, of course it is. We've had one of the sharpest economic downturns since the 1930s, and in any recession the young and unskilled are always the first to end up on the heap.

And how can reducing wages possibly help to close the wage gap with Australia? It simply doesn’t make any sense.

The report favours almost unrestricted foreign investment into New Zealand. But we already have liberal foreign investment laws. Some land acquisitions require consent, as do acquisitions of $100 million or more. But there really aren't many rules at all if someone wants to chuck a pile of money (though less than $100 million) into a non-land investment.

Does it really make any sense to loosen overseas investment rules further?

Don Brash’s prescription for growing industry is to reduce supposed barriers to entry across the board (i.e. "red tape"), rather than try to pick winners. This lacks imagination, and there’s no evidence it works. There are already so few regulatory or fiscal barriers to entry for new businesses. The real problem is a lack of venture and investment capital (thanks in part to our appalling savings record as a nation, and to our Wild-West under-regulated capital markets, which scare away investors), which won’t change if we slash regulation. The “diagnostic” approach favoured by the New Zealand Institute, which advocates using the regulatory and tax system to favour and support particular industries, is soundly rejected because there is “overwhelming evidence” that Brash’s approach will work better. Pardon me if I remain unconvinced by the so-called evidence. Saying something is so doesn’t make it so.

The reports advocates more privatisation in the education sector. Why this is needed is not clear. Doesn’t our education system already lead the world in many surveys and studies?

Those are my impressions from a brief perusal. There's probably more I could be angry and shake my fists at, but that'll do.

It's sobering to reflect that Don Brash was only a percentage point or two away from becoming Prime Minister in 2005. Imagine the political landscape we would find ourselves in had he won.

Famous Last Words

There is certainly no chance of me appearing before the court again as the defendant

Sections 108  and 109 of the Crimes Act 1961 suggest otherwise.

The Revelation Of Don

I haven't had time to take a good look at the 2025 Taskforce Report, but hope to do so in the next day or so. In the meantime, to get you thinking, here are some selected extracts from the report.

Revelation 1

1. The Revelation of Don, which God gave unto him, to show unto his servants things which must shortly come to pass; and he sent and signified it by his angel unto his servant Don:
2. Who bare record of the word of the neoliberals, and of the testimony of the Act Party, and of all things that its leader saw.
3. Blessed is he that readeth the Act Party manifesto, and they that hear the words of this prophecy, and keep those things which are written therein in their minds for regurgitating as a Taskforce report: for the time is at hand.
4. Don to the monetarists which are in Chicago: Grace be unto you, and peace, from him which is, and which was, and which is to come; and from the seven Spirits (vodka, gin, whisky, bourbon, brandy, tequila and rum) which Don drank before writing his report;
12. And I turned to see the voice that spake with me. And being turned, I saw seven golden BMWs driven by seven finance company directors on their way to court;
13. And in the midst of the seven BMWs one like unto Mark Bryers, clothed with an Armani suit down to the foot, and girt about the paps with serious bling.
17. And when I saw him, I fell at his feet as one dead, for his industry was a splendid example of the deregulation I really dig. And he laid his right hand upon me, saying, Fear not; for they won't get me.

Revelation 2

9.. I know thy works, and tribulation, and poverty (not personally, of course, but because someone told me it exists) and I know the blasphemy of them which say they are Progressives, and are not, but are the synagogue of Communism.

10. Fear none of those things which thou shalt suffer: behold, the devil shall cast some of you into welfare, that ye may become lazy and slothful and have many babies to different men; and ye shall have tribulation when Work and Income want to know who the father is: be thou faithful unto death, and I will give thee Atlas Shrugged.

11. He that hath a house in Epsom, let him hear what the Spirit saith when he be drained from his bottle; He that overcometh intoxication while making policy shall not be part of my Taskforce.

17. He that hath an ear, let him hear what the Spirit saith when the bottle be consumeth; To him that overcometh the tequila fumes will I give to eat of the hidden worm, and will give him a report, and in the report a lot of hocus-pocus written, which every man knoweth to be bullshit.

19. I know thy works, and charity, and service, and faith, and thy patience, and thy works; and let me tell you there’s no place in my worldview for any of those things.

20. Notwithstanding I have a few things against thee, because thou didst sufferest that woman Helen, which calleth herself a prophetess, to teach and to seduce my servants to vote Labour.
21. And I gave her space to repent of her rule; and she repented not.

22. Behold, I attempted to cast her from power, and them that commit voting for her into great tribulation, except they repent of their deeds, but not for long.
26. And he that overcometh Socialism, and keepeth his works (the beach house, the share portfolio and mistress) unto the end, to him will I give power over the nations:
27 And he shall rule them with a rod of iron; as the vessels of a potter shall they be broken to shivers: even as I received of my tax cuts.
28 And I will give him deregulation.
29. He that hath a share portfolio, let him hear what the Spirit saith once he hath drunk it, and let him write a report once he hath emptied the bottle.

Revelation 4

1. After this I looked, and, behold, a door was opened in heaven: and the first voice which I heard was as it were of a trumpet talking with me; which said, Come up hither, and I will show thee how you may destroy your nation’s prosperity.
2. And immediately I was in the spirit (I never can say no to strong liquor): and, behold, a throne was set in heaven, and one sat on the throne. and I thought, Bugger that, because after all that booze I really needed a piss.
3. And he that sat on the dunny was to look upon like a hardened prune: and there was a rainbow round about the throne, which to be honest was the reflection of my urine after I took a leak, after all I was busting.
4. And round about the bog were four and twenty other shitters: and upon those shitters four and twenty Business Roundtable members, clothed in dark suits; and they had on their heads bald patches, being greying men.
5. And out of the throne proceeded lightnings and thunderings and voices: and there were seven lamps of fire burning before the throne, which was a pretty stupid thing to have lit when you have a bunch of old men farting their rings out.

6. And before the first throne there was a sea of glass like unto crystal (that was my piss, sorry): and in the midst of the throne, and round about the throne, were four beasts full of eyes before and behind. How did some of the ACT caucus get in here?
7. And the first beast was like a lion (Rodney), and the second beast like a calf (that cow Heather), and the third beast had a face as a man (actually maybe that was Heather), and the fourth beast was like a flying eagle, though come to think of it, maybe it was a dodo.
8 And the four beasts had each of them six wings about him; and they were full of eyes within: and they rest not day and night, saying, Holy, holy, holy, slash government spending, which was, and is, and is to come.
9. And those beasts give glory and honour and thanks to the bloke having a shit on the throne.
10. The four and twenty suits fall down before him that sat on the throne, and worship him that liveth for ever and ever, and cast their crowns before the throne, saying,
11. Thou art worthy, O Sir Roger, to receive glory and honour and power: for thou hast created all things, and for thy pleasure they are and were created.

Revelation 5

1. And I saw in the right hand of him that sat on the throne a report written within and on the backside, sealed with seven seals.
2. And I saw a strong angel proclaiming with a loud voice, Who the hell wrote this piece of shite?
3. And no sensible man in heaven, nor in earth, neither under the earth, was able to open the report without bursting out in laughter, neither to look thereon.
4. And I wept much, because I thought it was a good effort on my part.

Revelation 7

1. And after these things I saw four of the ACT caucus members sitting in Parliament, holding the four winds of the earth within their buttocks, that the wind should not blow on the other members.
2. And I saw a fifth ACT caucus member ascending from his seat, having read my report: and he cried with a loud voice to the four others, to whom it was given to hurt the earth and the sea,
3. Saying, Hurt not the earth, neither the sea, nor the trees, till we have discussed this report and voted on it. I’m sure you’ll agree it’s bloody good stuff.

Revelation 8

1. And when Mr Key had opened the report, there was silence in heaven about the space of half an hour.
2. And I saw seven of his Cabinet members which stood before him; and to them were given seven trumpets.
3. And another cabinet member (Gerry) came and stood at Mr Key’s altar, having a golden crown (thanks to the Canterbury earthquake emergency legislation); and there was given unto him much incense, that he should offer it to the four ACT MPs who were desperate to let rip.
4. And the smoke of the incense, which came with Gerry’s prayers, ascended up before the debating chamber.
5 And Gerry took the censer, and filled it with fire of the altar, and cast it down onto the floor of Parliament: and there were voices, and thunderings, and lightnings, and an earthquake as the four ACT MPs let go all of the hot air within them.
6. And the seven ministers which had the seven trumpets prepared themselves to sound.
7. The first minister sounded, and there followed hail and fire mingled with blood, and my report was cast upon the earth.
8 And the second minister sounded, and as it were my entire career was cast into the sea: and became nothing;

13.And I beheld, and heard a minister flying through the midst of Parliament, saying with a loud voice, Woe, woe, woe, to the inhabiters of the far right, we’d like to do all this but the public won’t let us!

Revelation 13

1. And I stood upon the sand of the sea, and saw a beast rise up out of the sea, having seven heads and ten horns, and upon his horns ten crowns, and upon his heads the name of blasphemy.
2. And the beast which I saw was like unto a trade unionist, and his feet were as the feet of a socialist, and his mouth as the mouth of a rabblerouser: and the union members gave him his power, and his seat, and great authority.
3. And I saw one of his heads as it were wounded to death; and his deadly wound was healed, but then his Actor Equity mates shafted him good and proper.
4. And they worshipped the trade unionist which gave power unto the beast: and they worshipped the beast, saying, Who is like unto the beast? who is able to make war with him?
5. And there was given unto him a mouth speaking great things and blasphemies (workers’ rights, fairness and justice for all, a minimum wage); and power was given unto him to continue for ninety days, until he was sacked for no reason.
6. And he opened his mouth in blasphemy against the Market, to blaspheme its name, and its tabernacle.
7.And it was given unto him to make war with the neoliberals, and to overcome them: and power was given him over all kindreds, and tongues, and nations.

Revelation 18

1. And after these things I saw another minister come out of a Cabinet meeting, having great power; and the earth was lightened with his glory.

2. And he cried mightily with a strong voice, saying, New Zealand the great is fallen, is fallen, and is become the habitation of the Left, and the hold of every foul spirit, and a cage of every unclean and hateful welfare recipient.
3. For all nations have drunk of the wine of the wrath of her progressivism, and the kings of the earth have committed fornication with her, and the merchants of the earth are not nearly rich enough through the abundance of her delicacies, because of  a progressive tax system.

Revelation 19

1. And after these things I heard a great voice of much people in heaven, saying, Alleluia; Salvation, and glory, and honour, and power, unto the great Brash:
2. For true and righteous are his Taskforce reports: for he hath judged the great whore of Socialism, which did corrupt the earth with her fornication, and hath avenged the blood of his servants at her hand.
3. And again they said, Alleluia. And her smoke rose up for ever and ever.
4. And the four and twenty Business Roundtable members sitting on their bogs and the four ACT MPs fell down and worshipped me that sat on the throne (move over, Roger), saying, Amen; Alleluia.
5. And a voice came from the throne, saying, God I really needed to unload that. Sorry about the smell.

Revelation 22

6. And he said unto me, this report is faithful and true: and Sir Roger of the holy prophets sent his angel to show unto his servants the things which must shortly be done.
7. Behold, I come quickly: blessed is he that keepeth the sayings of the prophecy of this report.
8. And I, Don, saw these things, and heard them. And when I had heard and seen, I fell down to worship before the feet of Sir Roger, who showed me these things.
9. Then saith he unto me, See thou do it: for I am thy fellowservant, and of thy brethren the prophets, and of them which keep the sayings of this report: worship the Market.
10. And he saith unto me, let’s get to work: for the time is at hand.
11. He that is unjust, let him be unjust still:. That suits our purposes just fine.
20..He who testifieth these things saith, Yea: I come quickly. Amen: come, Sir Roger.
21.The grace of Ayn Rand be with us. Amen.