Friday, June 8, 2012

Some Internet Laws You May Have Missed - Updated

Most people know about about Godwin's Law. In short (quoting Wikipedia), this adage states: "As an online discussion grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving Nazis or Hitler approaches 1."

Here are a few other internet forum laws with particular relevance to the New Zealand scene.

Slater's Law: this is similar to Godwin's law. but swap out "Hitler" for "Cameron Slater" and "Nazis" for "Whaleoil". This law can be seen in practice on various left blogs.

Trotter's Law: Whatever Chris Trotter predicts about the left, the exact opposite will eventuate.

Mclauchlan's Law: Whatever the Dim Post predicts about the left will almost always eventuate.

The Red Alert Own Goal Law: All the good work put in by hard-working MPs on Labour's blogsite will be undone in an instant by one person's intemperate post.

Edwards' Law: As you get older and have more time to reflect on things you will use your blog to turn on everything and everyone you once loved.

Farrar's Law: The more time you spend reading the comments the more your health will suffer.

The Law of Common Sense:  As a blog discussion grows longer, the probability that Pete George will turn up approaches 1.

Brown's Law: Every blog thread will descend into a discussion about coffee.

Edgeler's Law: Graeme knows more than you do about everything.

I'll keep adding more as I/you think of them.

Have I missed any?

21 comments:

  1. I have had such a laugh - especially the Law of Common Sense!!!!

    Maybe you forgot Imperator's Law - As the posts grow longer the probability of having a good guffaw or chuckle approaches 1."

    ReplyDelete
  2. I agree the law of common sense is very funny and very accurate. Is there a law of common sense 1.1? The more comments that Pete George makes in a thread the less likely it is that the discussion contained in the threads will reflect what was in the original post?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Nothing about the likelihood of having me offer a correction?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Replies
    1. Surely Slater's Law is the same thing.

      Delete
  5. Lynn's law: The longer time goes without a post by Lynn Prentice the higher the likelihood that the next post will be a dissertation about what a crash-hot sys-op he is.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Needs a Lew's law and /or a Pablo's law.
    But my brain is struggling to come up with one for them..... Maybe something on convoluted torturous sentences for Pablo???

    ReplyDelete
  7. Savage Micky's law: the more one complains about threads being hijacked the more jack shit one makes a thread. Also known as Toothless Troll's Law.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. With a complete lack of self awareness Petey helps prove the law of common sense!

      Petey when you try to say something funny you should ensure that you are armed with a sense of humour ...

      Delete
  8. McCroskie's law: the more ubiquitous you are, the more likely your name is to be mis-spelled. Also known as Clarke's Law and Keys' Law.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Penny's law of considered opinions?

    ReplyDelete
  10. Ure's law: despite promoting your own blog repetitively on someone else's blog, you still end up spending all day commenting on someone else's blog as only tumbleweeds are visiting yours.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Bernard Hickey (interest.co.nz Law): The more discussion on any topic progresses, the likelihood about it becoming a discussion of peak oil and malthusian doom approaches 1 (exponentially of course).

    ReplyDelete
  12. The Law of the Whang: to be made the subject of an internet law, an individual must possess a penis.

    The Exception that Proves the Law of the Whang: Cactus Kate.

    The Law of Mandatory Retirement: If you recognise and appreciate the relevance of all the laws mentioned on this tread, you immediately must stop reading so many blogs.

    The Standard's Law: What Lynn Says ... OK?

    ReplyDelete
  13. Imperator Fish's Law:

    The importance of the issue addressed in the blogger's post shall be inversely proportional to the number of comments on that post.

    e.g. ...

    Imminent Nuclear Annihilation: zero replies.

    Some blogger in an obscure South Pacific country abusing another blogger about Imminent Nuclear Annihilation: infinite replies.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Re: Bernard Hickey's Law.

    Wouldn't the the likelihood of becoming a discussion of peak oil and malthusian doom approach 1 according to a logistic function rather than an exponential function?

    ReplyDelete
  15. ... or copyright. Or cycling. Things beginning with "C" anyway.

    ReplyDelete

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