New Zealand doesn't have a public debt crisis, whatever the politicians may be telling us. We have a major issue with levels of private debt, so there's room for the government to adopt a sensible spending programme aimed at boosting jobs and getting money moving around the economy again.
Some of our nation's largest infrastructure projects occurred as a reaction to the Great Depression. That catastrophic event led to the buildings of roads, bridges, and thousands of state houses, as the Labour government of the day took steps to get things moving again.
Let's also not forget that we were helped along a bit by World War Two. There were jobs for everyone, and Britain needed our produce.
But what worked then may not work now. We need a bold initiative that will inspire the public, transform our economy, and turn us into an international high tech centre of excellence.
We should also be capitalising on the strengths we already have. Some people might think we do cows and sheep and not much else, but they would be wrong. We're famous for our boat-building, and have become the go-to place for super-yachts.
So it makes perfect sense for us to build a battleship fleet.
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| HMS Nelson, named after some sailor guy, was one of Britain's most powerful warships during World War Two. It had really, really big guns |
If we commissioned say four of these capital ship behemoths, we would ensure that shipyards all around the country were suddenly buzzing. The money paid to the workers would circulate around the entire town, meaning everyone from the local car dealer to the brothel owner would get a slice of the action.
And, boy, what a sense of national pride we would feel as this massive battle fleet steamed into port.
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| The German ship Bismarck was one of the most fearsome battleships ever built. It was sunk by the British in disagreeable circumstances |
But what's this? I sense some doubt in my readers. You think the plan's a wonderful one, but still you have some reservations. However, I have already anticipated your concerns, so let me put your mind at rest.
We can't afford such a colossal expense: Well the expense sure would be colossal, but nothing good comes cheap. We'll have to raise taxes a bit to cover the cost, but I don't expect the top tax rate would go up to more than seventy five cents in the dollar. The cold hard fact is if we want cool stuff we have to be prepared to pay for it. Who wouldn't want battleships?
This is the wrong kind of stimulus: Nonsense. Just nonsense. Your argument is so laughable that I refuse to address it.
The people won't support such a vast project: They probably said that about the Great Pyramids too.
But the Egyptian Pharaohs had armies of slaves. You can't possibly compare these projects: But I just did. What are you going to do about it? Nothing, because this is my blog and you will play by my rules. Around here I'm the Pharaoh.
The nation will go bankrupt: Then we'll just print more money, dumbass!
These ships would be huge white elephants, rather than useful military instruments, and by the way, fool, don't you know your military history? Because the last world war showed how truly obsolete these types of ships were: The problem with elephants, even white ones, is they shit everywhere, and are liable to trample people to death without warning. Unlike the average battleship. In fact, why would anyone in their right mind compare a giant ruler of the waves with a mere land mammal? You call me a fool? Well you're the fool now. As for the ships being militarily obsolete, that's just defeatism. Where's your fighting spirit? Don't you love your country?
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| A depiction of the Japanese ship Yamato. The two Yamato class battleships were the largest and heaviest ever built. They were destroyed by the Americans. Their huge size made them easy targets for US aircraft, who wouldn't play fair. |
* Translation: those economists I agree with.
Surely you mean a navy of engineers?
ReplyDeleteI'd concluded that the phrase "sensible economists" was an oxymoron.
ReplyDeleteI am in favour! What's a couple of billion on battleships versus a couple of billion on the Roads of National Significance (which have cost benefit ratios less than 1.
ReplyDeleteThe only reason National have not gone battleship must be that Stephen Joyce played with cars and not ships as a boy.
The major problem would be our endemic skills shortage. There's no way our system can educate enough tattooists to cater for a navy of the size you propose.
ReplyDeleteRegards,
Hamish Crocket
The Nelson class battleships also illustrate the perils of signing up to international treaties like the TPPA, being unkindly called at the time the "Cherry Tree class" (cut down by Washington) after the British signed the Washington Naval Treaty and gave up building their N3 class battleships. The Bismark class reminds us of the danger of right wing governments, being similar to our businessmen in that it was an under-armed vanity piece easily dispatched to Davey Jones locker by the gimlet eyed admirals of the Royal Navy. And the Yamato is clearly a peon to the Greens, it being a vain glorious exercise in Autarchism quickly sunk when it came into contact with the physical manifestations of American corporate power.
ReplyDeleteSo we need to build this ship, http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/2/29/HMS_Vanguard_%28Battleship,_1946-1960%291.jpg
along with HMS Hood the most beautiful battleship ever built, and both proudly made in England.
Easily despatched?! It took half the Royal Navy and the suicidal daring of a number of naval pilots before the Bismarck went down, and on the way she blew the Hood out of the water and knocked the Prince of Wales out of the fight...
DeleteHood was an old ship that had not been modernized. Holland knew his ship had an out of date protection scheme and planned to attack the Bismark in a way that minimized the Hood's period of vulnerability. However, he botched his approach and his deployment of the Hood leading the newer and better armoured Prince of Wales was a fatal insistence on protocol. Having said that, it was still tragically bad luck that she was destroyed so easily. The sinking of the Hood was a huge propaganda coup and a big blow to RN pride, but she was an old ship and her loss was in no way comparable in terms of her importance as a fleet unit with the Bismark's sinking. The Bismark was a 51,000 ton ship armed with just eight 15" guns. The Rodney carried 9x16" guns on 33,000 tons. Another "treaty" battleship of the era, the USS South Dakota, also carried 9x16" weapons. The Bismark, for her displacement, was under armed. Like all Nazi warships her paper performance was impressive, but they all had major design flaws (a weak stern led directly to her loss when a single 18" torpedo completely destroyed her ability to manoeuvre) and got their high speed from very unreliable powerplants. All Nazi warships had unimpressive combat records against their equals. Prince of Wales scored just one damaging 14" hit but that hit effectively ended the Bismark's Atlantic foray. The POW was brand new and not fully combat ready, so she was not really "knocked out of the fight". She was never ready for it in the first place. The time from Rodney and KGV opening fire the Bismark to the total cessation of resistance by the German battleship was only about 30 minutes, with Rodney, a 21 knot ship built in 1925, doing most of the damage. The same thing occurred in the battle of the North Cape. HMS Duke of York destroyed the supposedly fast and powerful Scharnhorst with almost ridiculous ease. The Bismark was a powerful ship, but like all German ships of the Nazi era her main value was as propaganda, creating an fearsome reputation unjustified by the facts.
Delete*sigh* I am such an obsessive about this subject.
This is what you get when you combine military intelligence and sound economics. Or maybe it's MoBIE's (sorry MBEE) secret plan.
ReplyDeleteThe Bismark class reminds us of the danger of right wing governments, being similar to our businessmen in that it was an under-armed vanity piece easily dispatched to Davey Jones locker by the gimlet eyed admirals of the Royal Navy.
Hmmm. Not so sure about under-armed or easily dispatched. (Do agree with you about the vanity piece) And personally I rather like the Bismarck's rakish lines ahead of the Vanguard.